Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

osteobabe

Online | Search for a member

osteobabe

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Oxford, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 29 June 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1849
  • Number of comments : 56
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About osteobabe : Wallowing in collective pity

osteobabe's page activity

Visits<b>swharley</b> - 5 hours ago<b>ItsaBucsLife</b> - 5 hours ago<b>eaglerob</b> - 6 hours ago<b>spartan53</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 1:52am<b>cinskeep43</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 1:55pm<b>inner_peace</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 6:57pm<b>NickiPLZ</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 4:22am<b>sickkidsrock</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 12:36pm<b>sammy092</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 9:25am<b>Edogg215</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 11:49am<b>Just_Ya</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 12:00am<b>the1pumpCHUMP</b> - the 04/27/2014 at 6:17pm<b>Zangerous</b> - the 04/22/2014 at 9:54pm<b>Cely988</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 1:32pm<b>ActionFearo</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 5:04am<b>nathanzbbygirl</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 12:13am<b>Leoandam</b> - the 02/19/2014 at 8:12am<b>Straya_for_life</b> - the 02/07/2014 at 12:00pm

osteobabe's FML badges

I NEED to know!

You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of osteobabe's badges

osteobabe's favorite FMLs

Today, a drunk man wearing a sandwich-board proclaiming that, "The end is nigh" threw some so-called holy water at me while bellowing, "It's what Jesus would've wanted" and that I should "repent for being an evil shite." FML

#19674357
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15043) - you deserved it (1722)

On 05/24/2012 at 6:39pm - misc - by Notasinner (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm. FML

#19594950
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31641) - you deserved it (3036)

On 05/08/2012 at 10:05pm - intimacy - by laury - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

#19572377
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13130) - you deserved it (41287)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States

Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML

#19561833
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14193) - you deserved it (51165) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/02/2012 at 1:06am - love - by Flip (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, at a concert, I got into a fight with a man in a banana suit. FML

#19546385
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9671) - you deserved it (18117)

On 04/29/2012 at 5:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
582 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13065) - you deserved it (54042) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, I dolled myself up and hit the campus gym, hoping to leave with a cute boy's number. I left in a stretcher. FML

#19155355
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10357) - you deserved it (27552)

On 02/24/2012 at 6:01pm - health - by gabby - United States (Texas)

Today, even though she can barely deal with raising kids, my 19-year-old sister announced her fourth pregnancy, by a fourth man, of yet another race. Why? Because she wants to "be like Angelina Jolie." I fear that social services may laugh at me if I tell them. FML

#19059341
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36361) - you deserved it (2650)

On 02/12/2012 at 7:18pm - kids - by amythest - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, my girlfriend openly mocked me, calling me an idiot for thinking seahorses are real. She insists that they're like unicorns, and only exist in fiction. FML

#19011478
359 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36444) - you deserved it (4232)

On 02/06/2012 at 4:52pm - animals - by BoringFucker (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35798) - you deserved it (18839)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy (woman) - United States

Today, my fiancé and I got married. We both promised to remain abstinent until our wedding day. She's on her period. FML

#18117360
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45269) - you deserved it (8899)

On 10/31/2011 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Andrew - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, it was my first day on duty as a rookie cop. Everything was going great, and even the veterans on the force were warming up to me. That is until my mother came into the station carrying a brown bag for my lunch. Written on the bag was, "Lunch for my big boy. I love you, pumpkin." FML

#18072512
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36046) - you deserved it (5654)

On 10/25/2011 at 2:46pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I introduced my new boyfriend to my parents. Everyone knows he's into the emo scene, but this didn't stop my dad from slowly looking him up and down, then saying, completely deadpan, "You never told us you were a lesbian, honey." FML

#18041675
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19998) - you deserved it (33287)

On 10/21/2011 at 9:33pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I paid $70 to learn from the vet that my cat doesn't have a UTI, he's just developed a fetish for peeing on plastic bags. FML

#18034258
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21231) - you deserved it (2455)

On 10/20/2011 at 9:13pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I came home crying and informed my mother that someone had called me a 'fat bitch' today. She held me at arms length, looked me straight in the eyes, and lovingly said, "You can't change who you are." FML

#18030878
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31404) - you deserved it (5972)

On 10/20/2011 at 12:16pm - misc - by Anonymous - Ireland (Meath)



FML's blog

  • AD_e's Illustrated FML
  • Hi gang ! It's Friday once more and time for us to go on a magical mystery tour around the brain of yet another illustrator. This week, things have happened around the world that were so depressing, I don't…

Monday 18 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: