oneforceone

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oneforceone

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5000
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About oneforceone : Here is some stuff that you are reading.

oneforceone's page activity

Visits<b>wdin</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 4:00pm<b>expertsmilee</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 6:45pm<b>snowphi</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 12:51am<b>Vic699</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 12:16am<b>5tee</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 3:41pm<b>FinJage</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 12:43pm<b>cosicosei</b> - the 05/09/2013 at 8:33pm<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 8:25am<b>thisguy22</b> - the 02/27/2013 at 7:14pm<b>jjessen</b> - the 02/27/2013 at 6:13pm<b>oj101</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 3:12pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 02/03/2013 at 2:30pm<b>xxblmpknxx</b> - the 02/03/2013 at 11:08am<b>gmian</b> - the 01/31/2013 at 9:31pm<b>Falkin0113</b> - the 12/31/2012 at 1:53am

oneforceone's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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oneforceone's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on a plane returning to University, and I decided to shut my eyes. I opened them about 45 minutes later just as the plane landed to find I couldn't move at all. I was in sleep paralysis. The air hostesses had to lift me out of my seat. FML

by Dave / 09/27/2012 at 11:46am / United Kingdom / Health

Today, I heard of an inevitable world-wide bacon shortage on the news. FML

by bacon lovers worst nightmare / 09/26/2012 at 2:57am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought my nephew some giant green Incredible Hulk fists for his birthday. He thanked me by Hulk-smashing me in the nuts. FML

by smashed / 09/24/2012 at 10:33am / United States / Kids

Today, my boyfriend's transition into an annoying hipster is complete. It started with the not-really-necessary nerd glasses and the Mötley Crüe t-shirt, the final straw being the affected British accent. I'm considering where to dump the body. FML

by Anonymous / 09/24/2012 at 1:07am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, while dog sitting my neighbor's Great Dane, I decided to order pizza. As soon as I received it, the dog stood in the hallway staring at me. As soon as I moved, he ran full force and knocked me into the door, causing me to fall and drop the pizza, which he promptly devoured in front of me. FML

by Grauncho / 09/22/2012 at 10:12am / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, I woke up naked next to my gay roommate after a night of drinking. Neither he nor I remember anything. FML

by holyshitbatman / 09/22/2012 at 10:06am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

by identitychangeplease / 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Intimacy

Today, I was excited to get my first writing assignment since starting law school. I found out that I have to write a paper defending free speech. This wouldn't be a problem if I didn't have to defend the Westboro Baptist Church and if I weren't a former Marine. FML

by LawStudent / 09/19/2012 at 10:54am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I bought a new swing for our front porch. We put it together and sat down to enjoy our accomplishment. 5 minutes into our swing I threw up several times. I have really bad motion sickness, and apparently a swing is no exception. FML

by kacie smith / 09/16/2012 at 8:36am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was called into my son's school because he had got into a fist-fight with another pupil and I had to take him home. He clammed up about the reason behind the fight, until I finally managed to coax it out of him: the other kid is in "Hufflepuff" and he's in "Ravenclaw." FML

by PissOffPottermore / 09/13/2012 at 10:31am / United States (Illinois) / Kids

Today, I found an enormous raccoon in my backyard. After a couple of nasty scratches, I finally managed to capture the filthy animal. After calling animal control to relocate it, I waited for hours to learn that "relocating" actually means releasing it into my front yard 10 feet away. FML

by anonymous / 09/13/2012 at 2:02am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I had just bought a new $60 basketball and decided to go try it out. Five minutes into playing, the ball decided to roll into the hands of a little girl, who then said, "Mine". I thought it was cute, until she skipped over to her parent's car and they drove off. FML

by Bitchjackedmyball / 09/12/2012 at 4:52am / United States (Hawaii) / Kids

Today, I was assigned to write a short story about what we imagine Earth to be like in 500 years, and daily conflicts people experience. My teacher loved it and read it aloud to the class. He asked for my inspiration, and I didn't have the heart to say that I ripped off Mass Effect 3. FML

by brianfantana32 / 09/12/2012 at 12:24am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my co-worker and I were having a conversation in Russian. Our boss overheard us talking, shouted, "I know you're talking about me! I speak Spanish too!" and threatened to fire us. FML

by PuddlePirate / 09/07/2012 at 12:23pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work

Today, I'm so broke that I hand-washed my socks with a bar of soap that I stole from work. FML

by Lauraborealous / 09/05/2012 at 2:27pm / Canada (Alberta) / Money