oneforceone

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oneforceone

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4724
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About oneforceone : Here is some stuff that you are reading.

oneforceone's page activity

Visits<b>wdin</b> - the 12/18/2014 at 4:00pm<b>expertsmilee</b> - the 03/15/2014 at 6:45pm<b>snowphi</b> - the 02/03/2014 at 12:51am<b>Vic699</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 12:16am<b>5tee</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 3:41pm<b>FinJage</b> - the 07/21/2013 at 12:43pm<b>cosicosei</b> - the 05/09/2013 at 8:33pm<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 05/02/2013 at 8:25am<b>thisguy22</b> - the 02/27/2013 at 7:14pm<b>jjessen</b> - the 02/27/2013 at 6:13pm<b>oj101</b> - the 02/08/2013 at 3:12pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 02/03/2013 at 2:30pm<b>xxblmpknxx</b> - the 02/03/2013 at 11:08am<b>gmian</b> - the 01/31/2013 at 9:31pm<b>Falkin0113</b> - the 12/31/2012 at 1:53am

oneforceone's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

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oneforceone's favorite FMLs

Today, I went out drinking with my friends. At the end of the night I got a cab ride home. I must have passed out because when I woke up I wasn’t at my place, but my parent’s house, which is the address on my license…120 miles away. The fare was $220. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2009 at 4:12am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was having a really bad day and told my friend at lunch about how stressed I was and he gave me his brownie to cheer me up. After school, he texted me "Did the brownies kick in?" Yes, they did, right in the middle of my English presentation. They were "funny" brownies. FML

by englishclasshigh / 09/10/2009 at 5:34pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was sitting on a park bench with my very elderly grandfather while listening to music at a low volume. Suddenly, he turned to me and said very loudly, "I DIDN'T KNOW YOU HAD AIDS!" I received strange looks from everyone because he mistook my ear buds for a hearing aid. FML

by Missy / 09/09/2009 at 4:16pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, I realized that the shorts I have been wearing all day say "Juicy" on the ass. My name is John. FML

by JuicyJohn / 09/08/2009 at 9:33pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dentist asked me about my fillings, so I told him that when I was younger, I had 2 cavities. He replied, "No you didn't. I just looked at your x-rays." Turns out my old dentist ripped me off. I never needed fillings. FML

by itsjustnotfair / 09/05/2009 at 2:16pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, I was driving into a parking lot with some friends. I carelessly passed a sign when my friend said, "Wait what did that sign say?" I backed up to read it and guess what it said: "Severe Tire Damage. Do Not Back Up." Now all 4 of my tires are slashed. FML

by ooops / 09/02/2009 at 8:18pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I realized the person I had been habitually stealing bag lunches from at work made me a canned dog food sandwich. FML

by Hairball / 09/01/2009 at 2:05pm / United States (South Carolina) / Work

Today, I woke up to the sounds of birds singing, the smell of butter pancakes in the air and thought to myself "Wow, today is going to be great day. I can feel it!" Excited, I jumped out of my bed and threw open the door to see my 58 year old mother doing her morning stretches in the nude. FML

by MrMagicMan000 / 08/25/2009 at 2:47am / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, I was at my grandfather's house and my car was low on gas. He said I could put some of his gas in my car. He accidentally gave me the wrong tank to pump it out of, and I put fuel in my car that he uses for his small plane. It never ran better until the engine exploded. FML

by Boltz719 / 08/23/2009 at 1:10am / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, my work finally hired someone to replace some leaky pipes at work. I work in the basement by myself, and just as I walk under the newly fixed pipes, I get soaked with water. Apparently it was connected to a toilet. My boss couldn't find a replacement so they made me work covered in piss. FML

by lifestinks / 08/22/2009 at 11:29pm / United States (Nebraska) / Work

Today, it was my next-door neighbor's birthday. Over the past year, his pitbull has attacked my stepdad several times and put some stiches on me. Lucky for us, the dog was finally put down. For his birthday my neighbor got a new, bigger, pitbull. FML

by ShockBait / 08/22/2009 at 5:07pm / United States (New Jersey) / Animals

Today, I was driving on the freeway and there was a dead animal (I think a cat) in the road. The car in front of me decided to merge over. It kicked up part of the dead animal and sent it flying through my open window. I think I got hit in the face with a piece of foot. FML

by travinator121611 / 08/16/2009 at 12:32pm / United States (California) / Transportation

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was looking over the schedule for errors and circled a group of mistakes before handing it to my manager. When she handed it back to me, she gave me a weird look and I immediately noticed that the group of numbers I had circled formed a giant penis shape on the paper. FML

by dumblond / 08/14/2009 at 1:01pm / United States (Maine) / Work

Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for something to drink. I found a jug of lemonade with a piece of paper on it saying "Mom's Lemonade, Don't Drink!" I was really thirsty, so I ignored it and drank the whole jug. My mom is about to have a colonoscopy and had filled it with laxatives. FML

by Nick / 08/13/2009 at 3:47pm / United States (Minnesota) / Health

Today, while teaching swim lessons, a boy was holding a noodle and claimed it was his fishing rod. Trying to be fun, I grabbed on and told him to "reel" me in. He then yells out 'YAY, I caught a whale!'. FML