on_a_boat

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on_a_boat

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 45148
  • Number of comments : 51
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About on_a_boat : What's to tell?

on_a_boat's page activity

Visits<b>ncbb5</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 12:03pm<b>amcginle</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 2:03am<b>blackassmountain</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 1:33pm<b>ShinyMeatBicycle</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 1:19pm<b>spiers1</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 11:24pm<b>chylew</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 1:32pm<b>Eivana</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 6:39am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:37pm<b>gfonz</b> - the 08/15/2011 at 3:00pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 12:46am<b>NicoleS5000</b> - the 10/18/2009 at 10:51pm<b>Fentown</b> - the 10/11/2009 at 3:33pm<b>REDCRAYON</b> - the 07/30/2009 at 3:03pm<b>Envy3</b> - the 07/09/2009 at 1:36am<b>boricua_4life407</b> - the 06/08/2009 at 3:33pm<b>lizarddx0x0</b> - the 06/02/2009 at 2:59pm<b>annoyedwife5</b> - the 06/02/2009 at 2:45pm<b>hellomynameisril</b> - the 06/02/2009 at 2:03am

on_a_boat's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

on_a_boat's favorite FMLs

Today, I got home and threw my phone onto my bed as usual. This time it bounced out the window. FML

by jadakorn / 07/11/2009 at 9:48am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home and found a few of my faux fur coats completely butchered. On my way to interrogate my boys, the only ones home, I found our husky dog, who was recently shaved for an operation, covered in the fur that once belonged to my coat. My boys said 'he was cold'. FML

by Peta2nNoMore / 07/04/2009 at 6:42am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Kids

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

by I_Am_The_Edge / 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife and I watched a documentary film about a kid living with severe asthma. In one scene, the kid has a severe asthma attack, and is rushed to hospital. My wife started laughing hysterically at this and after apologising, goes "it's just he sounded exactly like you in bed." FML

by Weezylover / 05/26/2009 at 4:24am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Intimacy

Today, after being diagnosed with cat allergies, I explained to my cat-loving boyfriend that the doctor strongly recommended not allowing the cat in the bedroom. At 1:30 am my boyfriend got out of the bed to go sleep in the spare room because: "the cat is sad." FML

by Ames / 05/23/2009 at 12:07pm / United States (Alabama) / Love

Today, I was sitting at my college campus, there were good looking girls all around me and I was trying to catch their eye and smile, letting them know I'm available. A butterfly flew by me and I screamed. FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2009 at 8:11pm / United States (New York) / Animals

Today, after the church service was over, my two year old granddaughter started to sing into the microphone. She said, "Here Nana, you sing". I picked up the microphone and sang " Jesus Loves Me". She took the microphone back and said, "No he doesn't." FML

by nana / 05/19/2009 at 10:04am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids

Today, after the church service was over, my two year old granddaughter started to sing into the microphone. She said, "Here Nana, you sing". I picked up the microphone and sang " Jesus Loves Me". She took the microphone back and said, "No he doesn't." FML

by nana / 05/19/2009 at 10:04am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids

Today, after the church service was over, my two year old granddaughter started to sing into the microphone. She said, "Here Nana, you sing". I picked up the microphone and sang " Jesus Loves Me". She took the microphone back and said, "No he doesn't." FML

by nana / 05/19/2009 at 10:04am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids

Today, we were visiting my great-grandma, who has Alzheimer’s. We spent most of the day with her and she didn't know who we all were. Time came for us to leave so when I gave her a hug good-bye, she whispered into my ear, "You're my type." FML

by KarlwithaK / 05/18/2009 at 11:29pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, I gave my wife a cat. The first thing it did when it got out of the box was scratch the sh*t out of my leg. Next, it ran up to my wife and purred. She said, "Good cat." FML

by prevostsrocklike / 05/11/2009 at 8:38am / United States (Tennessee) / Animals

Today, I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year old child who was running past and knocked him out. FML

by airport / 05/10/2009 at 2:49pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I was serving a family at the restaurant where I work. When I went to ask the little girl what she wanted, I was tongue-tied and got "cutie" and "hun" mixed up and ended up asking, "What can I get for you, cuntie?" FML

by keeks_25 / 05/08/2009 at 4:53pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML

by eeh / 05/07/2009 at 10:45am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I had my first real meeting with my girlfriend's parents. We had dinner at a pretty upscale restaurant and everything was going great. When the check came, I offered to pay and I stood up to take out my wallet. When I opened it, 3 condoms fell out on the table in front of them. FML

by Brian / 05/04/2009 at 7:27pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love