About oliviaorourke : I love life.
oliviaorourke's FML badges
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
oliviaorourke's favorite FMLs
by UnfortunateGirly / 02/26/2010 at 3:30am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by disasterbutton / 02/08/2010 at 7:28pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at a school rally I was talking to my friends when I noticed the entire gym had gotten quiet. Not knowing why I thought it would be funny to yell out "it's too quiet!" apparently it was a moment of silence for a teacher that had recently died. FML
by wolfpacking / 02/02/2010 at 12:51am / Transportation
Today, I was talking to a hot girl at the bus stop. She seemed interested in me and I was feeling a connection forming. When the bus came, I offered to let her board first, but she said it "wasn't her bus" and said goodbye. Later, I realized I'd spent 20 minutes making moves on a prostitute. FML
by SlappyMcGee / 01/07/2010 at 7:19pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy
Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently copied my key before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering: “He looks like Jesus.” FML
by Anonymous / 12/20/2009 at 3:47am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was watching the show "Sixteen and Pregnant". I started bawling when the girl's dirtbag boyfriend proposed to her with a $20 ring he bought from Walmart because I was so lonely and was jealous of her "romantic relationship". FML
by Anonymous / 12/15/2009 at 10:30pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Miscellaneous
Today, we had company over, and after dinner, I saw a package of gumballs sitting on the table. Figuring my brother had brought them, I took one and bit it. I got a bunch of weird looks. Turns out wasn't a gumball - it was a mini paintball. FML
by BlueMouth / 12/15/2009 at 8:39pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, during a review session for a botany class, I began to space out. Then, I started to go, "beep, beep, beep, beep." I stopped when I noticed the entire class staring at me as if I were insane. This was not the first time this had happened. FML
by Anonymous / 12/10/2009 at 4:29am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by usmcgirl / 11/17/2009 at 10:18pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I fell asleep in a lecture. I laughed at something amusing in Dreamworld, but the laugh came out as a prolonged creepy groan in Lectureworld. I woke up to see everyone within a 5 meter radius staring at me. FML
by teepee / 11/13/2009 at 10:53am / United Kingdom (Oxfordshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, my secret crush, who sits next to me in Bio, asked if he could borrow my notes. I agreed. It was only after he drove away, with my notebook, that I realized that in the back of my notes, I had written his name 100 times, surrounded by little hearts. FML
by Lovenotes / 10/17/2009 at 7:05pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, while my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch, he looked down at my chest and said "I can't wait for the day that these produce milk." We've only been dating a few months and I have no intention of lactating anytime soon. FML
by e11ie / 09/27/2009 at 4:57pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
Today, on the train on the way to my mother's house, I was playing Mariokart with my son. He got a 'bomb' item, and yelled quite loudly, "I have a bomb!". Panic ensued. We got thrown off the train at the next stop. FML
by mariokarter / 08/28/2009 at 12:41am / United Kingdom (London) / Transportation
by itrustedsnapeallalong / 08/28/2009 at 12:23am / United States (Minnesota) / Love
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…