This member hasn't filled in their description.
ojosverdes26's FML badges
The rules are the rules
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
ojosverdes26's favorite FMLs
Today, I lost the remote control to my TV. I can't change the channel manually on it, and the channel it's stuck on is currently playing an infomercial for the Pos-T-Vac penis pump. I've been watching this for an hour now. I'm a female, and I'm beginning to feel like I need this product. FML
by Anonymous / 10/11/2010 at 6:50am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/09/2010 at 1:15am / New Zealand (Canterbury) / Intimacy
by bkay26 / 08/29/2010 at 11:37am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/29/2010 at 3:27am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
Today, it was really hot in my house so I pulled my shorts down so I was just in my boxers. My family and I were watching tv and I got a spontaneous erection. When I discreetly tried to pull my shorts back up, my penis flipped out of my boxers. FML
Today, I went to a water park, and the fee to get in was $39.95. Once I got in I was really thirsty, so I got a soda and then I hear over the intercom that the park is closing due to a clog in the cleaning system. I paid 43.67 for a soda. FML
by Still Dry / 08/17/2010 at 10:01pm / United States / Money
by JoannaG25 / 08/17/2010 at 7:43am / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Work
by GuardOtto / 07/22/2010 at 10:48am / United States / Work
Today, I went on my first date with a girl I have been infatuated with for months. At the restaurant, the waiter came while she was in the bathroom. I ordered steaks for both of us. Turns out, she is vegetarian, and doesn't like it when men are "overly aggressive". She called me a cow murderer. FML
by meatballz / 03/16/2010 at 12:28am / United States (Massachusetts) / Love
Today, I started to type up a mass text to tell a decent amount of my friends that I'd just come home to a surprise from my boyfriend. Trying to fix a typo, I accidentally hit send with the text only saying "Guess what?! I just came." FML
by anonymous / 03/14/2010 at 10:49am / United States / Geek
by Grossed Out / 03/13/2010 at 5:35am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 03/10/2010 at 3:53pm / United States (Utah) / Health
by ItHurtsLIkeHell / 03/01/2010 at 4:13am / Malaysia (Pulau Pinang) / Animals
by Wowsers. / 01/30/2010 at 3:47am / United Kingdom (Blackpool) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was sick with the flu so my boyfriend announced that he would make me some chicken soup. It was touching until I stumbled to the kitchen and found out that his "chicken soup" was actually leftover KFC bones boiled in water. FML
by samantha / 01/27/2010 at 9:05am / Singapore / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, it's been two years since I graduated with my master's. It's also been the same amount of…
- Today, my mom had to go to one of her relatives’ funeral. She came to borrow a black scarf from me,… Today, I’m in Sweden. This morning, I went out to get the mail in my pajamas. Well, it doesn’t only… Today, I’m in China, and I took my Golden Retriever to the groomer’s to get him cleaned up, because…