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ojosverdes26

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ojosverdes26
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 29 November 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 2351
  • Number of comments : 35
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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ojosverdes26's favorite FMLs

Today, having turned 18, I was eager to show my mother some of the clothes I'd like to purchase with my birthday money. I flipped my laptop open only to realise I had left a "Big Latina Booty gets a fat one" window open. Her howling screams of pleasure echoed through my kitchen. FML

#16074880
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10843) - you deserved it (51198)

On 05/07/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by Anon (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I lost my cat. It's deaf, so no matter what I do it can't hear me. FML

#15251582
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37597) - you deserved it (4133)

On 03/09/2011 at 3:03pm - animals - by blahhlovely_30 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend went down on me for the first time. Just as I was reaching climax my brother raced into the bathroom right next to my door and began to vomit extremely loudly. FML

#15202722
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30352) - you deserved it (4710)

On 03/05/2011 at 12:05am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

#15165919
339 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16513) - you deserved it (80509)

On 03/01/2011 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by Anon. (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, after some passionate love making with my husband, I accidentally farted on his leg. He shrieked and frantically began shaking his leg while screaming, "Get it off! Get it off!" FML

#15079652
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18721) - you deserved it (30465)

On 02/22/2011 at 4:02pm - intimacy - by CutieBooty (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was in my car and stopped at a red light. A homeless woman then started to throw rocks at my car for no apparent reason. I drive a convertible. FML

#14987191
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23921) - you deserved it (4108)

On 02/15/2011 at 5:21am - misc - by nakcba -

Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML

#14239433
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38483) - you deserved it (3342)

On 12/17/2010 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML

#14239433
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38483) - you deserved it (3342)

On 12/17/2010 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML

#14239433
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38483) - you deserved it (3342)

On 12/17/2010 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my wonderful boyfriend asked me if I wanted him to cook me scrambled eggs with sausage for breakfast. When I said yes, he pulled out his junk, and started shaking it violently in my face. FML

#14058992
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31863) - you deserved it (9142)

On 12/02/2010 at 10:54am - intimacy - by sissydlk (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was in a public washroom and I had to take a dump. I knew how dirty the toilets were, so tried to do the "stand and poo." Unfortunately, I slipped and the poo fell on the ground. Then I realized there were no paper towels. There was a line outside waiting. FML

#13799884
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13474) - you deserved it (25234)

On 11/11/2010 at 8:30am - health - by sweet_stufz - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to Ikea with my family. I was wearing a yellow polo that vaguely looked like the ones the Ikea employees were wearing. Two dozen people came up to me, complaining that I was staring at furniture instead of helping customers. FML

#13698709
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18346) - you deserved it (9084)

On 11/03/2010 at 6:43am - misc - by MissIsabel - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got fired over MSN. I wasn't even online at the time. FML

#13694009
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18924) - you deserved it (1852)

On 11/02/2010 at 10:16pm - work - by werewolfoflondon (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my marriage counselor told me I have the communication skills of a Lou Gehrig's patient. FML

#13691597
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7410) - you deserved it (11924)

On 11/02/2010 at 7:34pm - misc - by djangle (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was laying in bed with the covers over me, when I got an itch on my leg. It felt really good to scratch it so I got really into it. At that very moment my mom walked in, saw me doing a back and forth motion under the covers, gave me a look of disgust, and walked out. FML

#13673101
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24154) - you deserved it (5128)

On 11/01/2010 at 9:00am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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