About ohsmart15 : Hi! I'm just a normal teen!!
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ohsmart15's favorite FMLs
Today, at the bank where I work, I escorted a very short woman to her safe deposit box in the vault. I left her alone, knowing she could use the phone to call the reception when she was ready to leave. We later realised the phone was too high for her to reach. If glares could kill. FML
Today, I started to come to during dental surgery. I clearly heard someone behind me say "Shit! Get this fucker back under!" then another person mentioning they'd have to kill me to avoid "another lawsuit", followed by laughter and the blackness of sleep. FML
by Anonymous / 10/06/2013 at 5:49pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health
Today, while in class, I had to sneeze. Not wanting to make a lot of noise, I held it in, only to instead let out a huge, long fart. Everyone, including the teacher, turned and stared at me intently. FML
by Anonymous / 09/30/2013 at 12:22pm / United States (Iowa) / Miscellaneous
by NiquetChrome / 04/14/2013 at 7:18pm / France / Miscellaneous
by Saradee / 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 10/21/2012 at 8:29pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/07/2012 at 1:08am / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
Today, I have a heart condition that causes migraines and fainting, so I take salt tablets to stop the fainting. The migraines can lead to a stroke, so I have medication for them. The medication has a side effect: fainting. And to avoid migraines, I should avoid salt. FML
by Neurocardiogenic Syncope / 08/24/2012 at 12:08am / Canada / Health
by stupidbullcrêpe / 08/20/2012 at 6:06pm / Brazil (Sao Paulo) / Health
Today, my son displayed an interest in chess, and asked me to teach him to play. Five minutes in, I captured his queen. He screamed "SCREW THIS STUPID GAME", slammed his fist down on his pieces, and started crying because of the pain. He's fourteen years old. FML
by Anonymous / 08/13/2012 at 8:55pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Kids
Today, I was digging in my lawn, trying to ignore the suspicious glances coming from my nosy fuckball of a neighbor. When he asked what I was doing, I replied with dripping sarcasm, that I was digging up the schoolkids I killed last year. Fifteen minutes later, the cops he called arrived. FML
by diggingaplotforone / 08/11/2012 at 7:47pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by kumbuck3t15 / 07/29/2012 at 4:20pm / Mexico (Baja California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had a job interview, for which I spent hours preparing. My interviewer was nothing more than a pimple-faced teen, and after only two minutes of reviewing my qualifications, he lost interest and started asking such questions as which Hogwarts house is my favorite. FML
by Anonymous / 07/20/2012 at 4:26pm / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Work
Today, what started as my mom calling my grandma for a recipe turned into them discussing the philosophical reason behind my baking. I apparently picked up baking because I'm depressed over unemployment. And here I thought I just liked the smell of baked goods. FML
by Shortcake / 07/04/2012 at 9:48pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
- Today, while getting it on with my boyfriend, I decided to be spontaneous and do something sexy. I… Today, since I'm too ashamed to go buy a proper sex toy, I used an old Star Wars toy sword instead.… Today, I thought one of my flatmates was beating his girlfriend, so I barged in about to stop him.…