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ohshizitzrissa's favorite FMLs
Today, I hooked up with the guy I've liked for a while, even though my friends joked that his large pickup truck meant that he was "compensating" for having a small penis. They were right. Very right. FML
by CityBoysNow / 09/10/2013 at 8:14pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy
by NoNotCats =^._.^= / 09/03/2013 at 4:17am / United States (Arizona) / Health
by Anonymous / 06/20/2012 at 7:08pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
by Anonymous / 10/21/2011 at 5:27pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work
by Fattymuch / 09/14/2011 at 10:27am / India (Karnataka) / Health
Today, my daughter had just left for a date with her boyfriend. All of a sudden, she runs back in the house screaming "I forgot to take my birth control!" That is not something a father wants to hear. FML
by dad / 06/29/2009 at 12:38pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids
Today, I was in line at a checkout. I have quite a few facial piercings and 1/2" gauges in my ears. The very heavy cashier asks how big my gauges are and then starts telling me about how she recently got her clitoris pierced and how sometimes she has orgasms behind the register. FML
by toomuchmetal / 06/24/2009 at 3:17pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
Today, I went to visit my Grandmother, accidentally leaving my phone home during the weekend. When I got back I had 2 texts from my crush. One saying "I want to take the most beautiful girl to prom, go with me?" and the other saying, "Fine fattie, I'll ask someone else." FML
by promdump / 03/06/2009 at 9:55pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
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- 1Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 2Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 3Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say…