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ohmandapants

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ohmandapants

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 July 1993 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 5168
  • Number of comments : 1300
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About ohmandapants : I'm a generally open-minded person. I don't take shit from anyone but I'm friendly if you get on my good side. If you're on my bad side, chances are you're staying there. I'm pretty opinionated but can be pretty shy, depends who I'm with.

ohmandapants's page activity

Visits<b>Edogg215</b> - 6 hours ago<b>tagallopes</b> - yesterday at 6:38am<b>PeartOfNeils</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 3:13pm<b>alex602</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 3:45am<b>StupidlyCute</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 2:24am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 10:21pm<b>boomHEADSHOTllll</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 12:00pm<b>guskta</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 12:14am<b>AkaMido</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 10:13am<b>boredSOLDIER</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 8:23am<b>xDochx</b> - the 07/28/2014 at 1:18am<b>elvis103</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 8:40pm<b>blackheart96</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 5:16am<b>poulkrebs</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 7:11pm<b>jjones0818</b> - the 07/19/2014 at 11:59am<b>sweetkitten69</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 2:27am<b>Tthug</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 6:35pm<b>blackhawkdown69</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 8:26pm

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ohmandapants's favorite FMLs

Today, I gave my 16 year old step daughter and her friends a lecture on respecting other people's privacy. Two hours later, I accidentally walked into her room without knocking. She and her friends were giving each other bikini waxes. Now her friends call me the hypocritical pervert. FML

#1885333
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13521) - you deserved it (72957)

On 05/12/2009 at 8:23pm - kids - by firewait (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at the gym when I saw one of my friends at the water fountain. I went over and gave him a man ass slap while he was drinking. It wasn't my friend. I now have a black eye. FML

#1288904
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12135) - you deserved it (59757)

On 04/24/2009 at 1:20pm - health - by JohnFarrell (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I told my morbidly obese teacher that he had mustard on his chin. He tried to wipe it off and I said without thinking "No, your other chin." FML

#1183815
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35476) - you deserved it (92802)

On 04/21/2009 at 1:42am - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I were watching TV. She starts to undo my belt buckle, unzips my fly and then takes my pants off. Right as I'm starting to get really excited, she says to me, "Just joking." FML

#946704
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (147288) - you deserved it (21586)

On 04/13/2009 at 9:44am - intimacy - by Hikara (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I asked my girl friend of a year and a half to give me a blow job. She replied okay and bent down and blew on my penis. Then she looked up at me and said was that good. She was serious. FML

#909616
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67308) - you deserved it (19879)

On 04/11/2009 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I asked my girl friend of a year and a half to give me a blow job. She replied okay and bent down and blew on my penis. Then she looked up at me and said was that good. She was serious. FML

#909616
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67308) - you deserved it (19879)

On 04/11/2009 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, my parents and I were looking through old photos. My dad comments, "Wow you were chubby back then. But that's ok, it was baby fat." Then he turns to me and asks, "What's your excuse now?" FML

#521757
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51626) - you deserved it (10102)

On 03/21/2009 at 11:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Delaware)

Today, I was at work and a very obese woman came in to get a pedicure. When she took her shoes off I noticed an odd black substance on her feet. I started scrubbing it off and wondered out loud, "What IS this stuff??" As a chunk of it fell onto my lip, she replied, "Girl, that's just the fungus." FML

#259526
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (101091) - you deserved it (6306)

On 03/10/2009 at 7:55am - work - by SalonGirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was writing an email to our entire company regarding a fundraiser we are taking part in for children and adults with disabilities. I was rushing to get the email out and hit send before I realized that instead of "Best Regards" I had typed "Best Retards" as the closing line. FML

#226271
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26648) - you deserved it (36908)

On 03/06/2009 at 1:53pm - work - by Can't Spell Worth A Damn (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was singing Alicia Keys in the shower and hitting the insanely high notes. My father ran into the bathroom and threw open the shower door, screaming. He thought I was wailing in pain. FML

#179032
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17024) - you deserved it (42157)

On 03/02/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by legit (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was discussing sex with my guy friends in their dorm when I asked one of them what he would do if I got naked and crawled into his bed. He replied, "Nothing. You're one of the guys now." They all agreed. FML

#113943
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60853) - you deserved it (21054)

On 02/23/2009 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by NeverGonnaGetAny (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while changing my tampon in the stall of my high school's bathroom, I lost control of the plastic applicator. The blood-covered apparatus shot out like a rocket underneath the stall door. For a moment I thought no one noticed, then the screaming began. FML

#99894
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49077) - you deserved it (5177)

On 02/21/2009 at 10:16pm - misc - by isuckatlife (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my grandmother told me that not only does she not accept me as a homosexual man, but that she feels my relationship with a little person is "spitting in God's face." FML

#56713
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41307) - you deserved it (11776)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:34pm - love - by iamatthewroberts (man) - United States (Kentucky)



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