ohcrapitscurtis

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Offline (the 04/25/2016 at 6:07am)

ohcrapitscurtis

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 29 October 1987 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 708
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ohcrapitscurtis : I can read FMLs literally all day. So keep them coming.

ohcrapitscurtis's page activity

Visits<b>jdscott28</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 2:23am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 7:55pm<b>wandering_soul</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 1:43pm<b>dansco</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 9:13pm<b>RawrPancaked</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 1:43pm<b>sarahhhl</b> - the 07/31/2015 at 8:43am<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 8:14pm<b>TheRugMan</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 11:42pm<b>Capriciousfox</b> - the 05/15/2015 at 11:02am<b>DoTheWindyThing</b> - the 04/30/2015 at 4:13pm<b>SaltyC</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 4:10pm<b>itztaychickaa</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 11:12am<b>LovelessAlex</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 11:18am<b>Ashd09</b> - the 11/28/2014 at 7:33pm<b>pexylexy</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 6:28pm<b>hellsangel0519</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 11:55am<b>Gr8wise1</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 12:03pm<b>hetalia_thailand</b> - the 07/18/2014 at 9:50am

ohcrapitscurtis's FML badges

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

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ohcrapitscurtis's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm sick with a stomach flu. For the last 5 hours, I've been going back and forth from the couch to the bathroom. Each time I get into the bathroom, I have to make a choice of whether to sit on the toilet or kneel by it. Each time I have to clean up the other mess. FML

by Anonymous / 02/23/2015 at 12:56pm / United States / Health

Today, I came home from work to find that my girlfriend had sold all of my N64 and Atari games and both the consoles and bought me a PS4 with the money. While I was standing there in shock, she kissed me on the cheek and said, "I know, I'm the greatest." FML

by Anonymous / 02/22/2015 at 3:41pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found a very light blonde long hair on my marital bed's pillow. I confronted my husband about it and after hours of arguments and me throwing his stuff out of the house, I found another. Attached to my head. My husband isn't having an affair, I'm just going grey. FML

by mastel07 / 12/10/2014 at 7:59am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Love

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was playing with my little nephew and began to tickle him playfully, even though I know he doesn't like to be tickled. When I was done, he looked me straight in the eye, punched me in the groin, and told me, "No one tickles me". He's six. FML

by Ginger_Gawd / 01/20/2014 at 10:34pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML

by MommyProblems / 01/19/2014 at 12:17am / United States / Kids

Today, my 19-year-old brother subjected me to yet another rant about how the writers of My Little Pony aren't writing the show for people like him any more, the "true fans", otherwise known as pimply-faced adults who don't use deodorant and only shower once a week. FML

by Anonymous / 12/27/2013 at 3:50pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I superglued the sole back into my shoe. Unfortunately, the glue didn't dry as quickly as it said it would on the bottle. The glue seeped through the sole and my foot got superglued to my shoe. FML

by footstuck / 11/13/2013 at 12:51pm / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, as always, my boyfriend has the ability to pop his eyeballs out of his eye sockets. He thought it'd be funny for me to wake up face-to-face with the disgusting sight. The shit in my bowels did an early Thanksgiving Day parade straight into my underwear. FML

by Anonymous / 11/10/2013 at 6:27pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that when my dad said he would pay for my college, he really meant that he was going to forge my signature on a student loan in my name and not make payments on it. FML

by oh... / 10/20/2013 at 4:34pm / United States (Missouri) / Money

Today, I accidentally texted a picture of my cock to my dad. FML

by Anonymous / 10/04/2013 at 7:36pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my husband and I switched phones by accident. I've already received several naked pictures from one of his co-workers. FML

by Anonymous / 09/28/2013 at 12:08am / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, I was playing World of Warcraft, when all of a sudden, I remembered I was supposed to be at a wedding. I was 25 minutes late to my own wedding. FML

by Anonymous / 09/14/2013 at 1:23am / United States (Ohio) / Geek

Today, while walking into a hotel room, I passed by a full-sized mirror. My reflection scared me so badly that I punched the mirror, which then shattered and resulted in several cuts to my hand. FML

by igotsbadluck / 07/17/2013 at 5:44pm / United States (Tennessee) / Transportation