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officialkaytee

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officialkaytee

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 20 May 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 125
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About officialkaytee : "I got the lightest touch when it comes to rollin' that shit up."

officialkaytee's page activity

Visits<b>seeoseek</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 11:28pm<b>dangerika93</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 2:34pm<b>heffastera</b> - the 08/19/2013 at 2:32am<b>chickaslimshady</b> - the 07/22/2013 at 3:38am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 6:45pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/13/2013 at 9:26pm<b>Covenant74</b> - the 03/29/2013 at 3:25am<b>waffule365</b> - the 03/28/2013 at 12:26pm<b>zebralover23</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 10:13pm<b>BexBaby86</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 5:00pm<b>allyson12345</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 4:02pm<b>astonedraccoon</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 4:01pm<b>bballmatt</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 3:41pm<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 03/23/2013 at 2:46pm<b>Dodopy</b> - the 03/19/2013 at 12:14am<b>bellabuxton</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 11:33am<b>baba01</b> - the 03/14/2013 at 9:28am<b>AliceeH</b> - the 03/10/2013 at 10:31pm

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officialkaytee's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

#20925183
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26962) - you deserved it (38699)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, at work, I had to utter the phrase, "Sir, please stop rubbing yourself with the peas." It's exactly how it sounds. FML

#20847854
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42514) - you deserved it (2977)

On 08/21/2013 at 1:30pm - work - by twatstick (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, my boyfriend suggested that we become "drug dealers" because I'm a chemistry student and he's seen a few episodes of Breaking Bad. FML

#20812711
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44873) - you deserved it (4801)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:50am - misc - by Bnewlove - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was walking down the street and saw a man trip over a sign. He then grabbed his cane, started screaming, and began beating the sign. Apparently that didn't release his anger, so he began to beat the nearest car. I thought it was hilarious, until I noticed it was my car. FML

#20774578
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44898) - you deserved it (9147)

On 07/10/2013 at 4:10pm - misc - by mylifesucks - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that my 16-year-old son bought a huge amount of grape juice, because he thought he could store it under his bed and wait for it to turn to wine. FML

#20766880
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44349) - you deserved it (4800)

On 07/06/2013 at 11:14am - misc - by StockedWithJuice (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, at the doctor's, I had lots of papers to fill out so my boyfriend offered to help. We submitted them and the doctor called me a few minutes later. Under disorders my boyfriend had written, "Major cock craving disorder." The doctor couldn't stop giggling. FML

#20763013
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58684) - you deserved it (10832)

On 07/04/2013 at 3:03am - intimacy - by Never Going Back To The Doctor (woman) - United States

Today, I decided to try Karate. In an attempt to roundhouse-kick a hanging boxing glove, I knocked over a lamp, lost my balance and pulled down my curtains. My neighbor then looked through the window, started laughing and yelled, "KUNG FO POWA!" FML

#20749220
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25215) - you deserved it (31859)

On 06/26/2013 at 9:57pm - misc - by blahblah (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked in on my husband eating cat food out of the cat bowl dressed in a cat costume. FML

#20577178
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51156) - you deserved it (5642)

On 04/06/2013 at 7:42am - misc - by confusedcatlover (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I told my bald, goatee-sporting chemistry teacher that he looks like Walt from Breaking Bad. I quickly got sent to the principal's office and received a 3-day suspension for "slandering" my teacher by implying that he makes meth. FML

#20574865
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34008) - you deserved it (5996)

On 04/04/2013 at 4:07pm - misc - by me (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was cleaning one of my disabled clients because he pooped himself, so I started to undress him for a shower. I took his dirty diaper off and set it on his bed, then I bent over to take off his socks at which point he put the diaper on my head like a hat. FML

#20438439
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49991) - you deserved it (4607)

On 01/02/2013 at 10:49am - work - by habassistant - United States (Ohio)

Today, my neighbor went on vacation, leaving me in charge of his cat and dog. For some reason, he calls his dog "Cat" and his cat "Dog". There are two pet food containers, one labeled "Cat" and the other labeled "Dog". I have no idea which one goes to which animal. FML

#20437796
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37720) - you deserved it (4002)

On 01/02/2013 at 1:07am - animals - by catdog - United States (California)

Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML

#20409541
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33089) - you deserved it (3929)

On 12/20/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by jsmills92 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML

#20191552
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11879) - you deserved it (27996)

On 12/04/2012 at 9:43pm - work - by whitecollar - United Kingdom (York)

Today, it was my first day in Paris. I've been saving up for five years. It was a rainy day, but I was determined to go see the Eiffel Tower. On my way, I fell down a slippery set of stairs and knocked both of my front teeth out. Now, I have the view of the Eiffel Tower from my hospital window. FML

#20124910
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25812) - you deserved it (2674)

On 10/20/2012 at 3:06am - health - by parisklutz (woman) - France (Lorraine)

Today, my dad saw on TV that in some parts of Africa, it's not uncommon for people to attach make-shift flamethrowers to their cars to defend against carjackers. He's now lost his mind and is forcing me to help him put one together to scare off Jehovah's Witnesses. FML

#20124199
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17660) - you deserved it (1994)

On 10/19/2012 at 5:39pm - misc - by Watchtower? More like fortress. (man) - Norway (Oslo)



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