Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

odamaliekh

Offline (the 08/10/2015 at 4:49pm) | Search for a member

odamaliekh

50Fucked!

odamaliekhodamaliekh
  • Town/Country : Trondheim, Norway
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 10 April 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1056
  • Number of comments : 82
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

About odamaliekh : Hi there!

My name is Oda Amalie, and i'm 22.

I work in a kindergarden, and i'm studying to become a teacher. In my spare time I watch Netflix with my girlfriend, hike in the mountains, or play Gta San Andreas.. I'm also a huuuuuge Twin Peaks fan.
Oh, and I have a passion for beer. Cheers!

odamaliekh's page activity

Visits<b>Caro97songs</b> - yesterday at 2:40pm<b>Hop6e</b> - yesterday at 12:25am<b>MNBOY16</b> - yesterday at 9:25pm<b>wil1029</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 6:19pm<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 10:59pm<b>tiredofwaiting</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 12:04am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 5:58pm<b>Mikeyburn85</b> - the 07/26/2015 at 11:34am<b>ThisGirlx</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 5:19pm<b>WD_Stevens</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 3:06pm<b>FireDemon_101</b> - the 07/23/2015 at 1:02am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 7:00pm<b>jforren</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 11:04pm<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 11:34am<b>Spdt5561</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 1:18am<b>dirtbikeguy</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 12:10am<b>sagefitts</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 10:31pm<b>kangx1</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 8:40pm

Fucked!<b>tiredofwaiting</b> - the 07/30/2015 at 6:04am<b>connorgrant98</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 8:31pm<b>One_Way</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 5:15am<b>nonsensical</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 1:16am<b>myelias25</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 1:46am<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 1:13am<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 10:55pm<b>tomjay007</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 6:53pm<b>rafa015</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 6:04pm<b>lukian</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 5:40pm<b>clairesucks</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 5:32pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 4:31pm<b>sandman676</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 2:24pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 1:15pm<b>cecesavannah2015</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 12:53pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 10:19am<b>mirrriam</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 9:58am<b>MalekiMaker99</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 8:55am

odamaliekh's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of odamaliekh's badges

odamaliekh's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke to find a pool of my own blood all over my pillow. Frantic to find the source of the blood, I rushed into the bathroom and tripped over my too-long pajama pants. Crashing to the floor face first, I broke my nose. Turns out I had just bitten my lip in the middle of the night. FML

#21444253
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23321) - you deserved it (3268)

On 07/19/2015 at 11:02pm - health - by Bleach dat Blood (woman) -

Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML

#21403147
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34309) - you deserved it (3808)

On 05/01/2015 at 10:22pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I held my bag of burger and fries out the window while driving, to preserve that new car smell. Not only did I hit a pothole and lose my lunch, I got pulled over by a cop who suspected I was either littering or tossing drugs when I saw him. FML

#21268936
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19635) - you deserved it (40324)

On 10/01/2014 at 12:53pm - misc - by ThatNewCarSmell (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I managed to not laugh as a potential high-profile Italian client with a heavy accent repeatedly pronounced "sheet metal" as "shit metal". Unfortunately, my boss and a senior colleague couldn't contain their own laughter. We lost that deal, and our jobs are now endangered. FML

#21227795
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37285) - you deserved it (4580)

On 08/02/2014 at 6:37pm - work - by Shitmetalseller (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, my fiancé said "Rachel" instead of my name when asked to repeat, "I take thee, Emily, to be my lawfully wedded wife." I was shocked, so he explained while laughing that he doesn't even know a Rachel. He ruined our wedding for a Friends quote. FML

Today, I finally worked up the guts to add the guy I like on Facebook. To make it less obvious, I added 15 other people as well. Everyone added me back, except him. FML

#21125472
120 comments

Today, my professor ran half a mile in the pouring rain just to return my cell phone, which I had left behind in lecture. Shocked and embarrassed, I exclaimed, "You shouldn't have!" "Damn right," he responded, "I'm 64 years old." FML

#21113974
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40448) - you deserved it (12137)

On 04/15/2014 at 7:18pm - work - by sad but true. - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was walking in the park, when a kid ran up and hit me in the stomach. He said, "Don't get mad, get glad!" and ran off. FML

Today, after two weeks of being grounded, I was finally let out of the house by my mom. I had to call her at 1am asking her to come get me, because I got so drunk, I told my ride to leave without me. I'm grounded again after less than a day of freedom. FML

Today, I was visiting my daughter, whose husband was still asleep at noon. I made a point of stomping around on the hardwood floor and speaking loudly to wake his lazy ass up. Turns out he's now working a 14-hour graveyard shift, and it has no negative effect on his shoe-throwing skills. FML

#20193830
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5537) - you deserved it (76519)

On 12/06/2012 at 2:23pm - misc - by mom (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I discovered that I have been falsely accusing my sister of stealing my makeup. How do I know this? Because I found said makeup in the trunk of my boyfriend's car, next to a bag that had fishnet tights and red stilettos in it. Oh, and the stilettos are his size, in case you were wondering. FML

#19999762
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31781) - you deserved it (2787)

On 08/03/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by SingleAgain (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my husband and I had just got over a big argument, and I asked him to cut me some cucumbers for my eyes to help me relax. I was laying down, eyed closed, and he set them on my eyes. They weren't cucumbers, they were lemons. FML

#16304417
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23031) - you deserved it (44972)

On 05/22/2011 at 9:58pm - misc - by lemonhead -

Today, the electrician came because our kitchen light has been flickering. After examining the installation, he screws the lightbulb tighter in the socket. My parents both are PhDs. FML

#6596231
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27582) - you deserved it (7576)

On 12/04/2009 at 5:16am - kids - by PhDdaughter (woman) - Switzerland (Fribourg)

Today, a bee flew in my car so I swerved off the road and hit a mailbox. It was a metal keg filled with cement buried in the ground. Taking my father's advice I fled the scene. Later my mailman knocked on my door holding part of my bumper. He said "Excuse me, I think you hit my mailbox this morning." FML

#6255254
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6187) - you deserved it (40088)

On 11/11/2009 at 8:03am - misc - by Sybil90 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found a dead puppy in my backyard. I have never owned any pets. FML

#5966909
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39644) - you deserved it (2244)

On 10/23/2009 at 10:59pm - misc - by WhyMe (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: