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About nukeacat : Has had three open heart surgeries.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
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yesterday I found out tat ma boyfriend is a Mormon,en is moter greeted me saying ow appy se was er son ad found imself a Mormon girlfriend. I know noting about Mormonism, except fromat I've seen on Sout Park, and I'm an ateist. FML
Today, my parents were coming to visit me at my brand new apartment. I made dinner an served tem te cake my roomate ad left 4 me in te fridge. Tirty minutes after tey left, I was so baked tat I couldn't tink straigt. I still don't know if my parents made it ome. FML
Today,ile working at te zoo, I noticed a boy trowing candy into te wartog's exibit. Te fastest way to get tere was to go troug te exibit, and speak to te kid from inside. I must ave said tree wordsen a lollipop it me in te eye. Ten te wartog peed on me. FML
Today, mah family took me to a steak house . I went 4 an eight minute bathroom break, coming back to an empty table . They ordered dessert, an left me the bill . I'm a vegetarian, an it's mah birthday . FML
TODAY, AT THE BLACK FRIDAY SALE, A FULLY GROWN MAN HIT MAH 5 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER 4 AN XBOX . IN ANGER, I PUNCHED THE GUY AND GAVE HIM A BLOODY NOSE . I'M NOW BANNED FROM BEST BUY, AND MAH DAUGHTER HAS A CONCUSSION . MEGA FML
Today, I was watcing wrestling videos on YouTube,en my little broter walked in. Later, my little broter told my parents tat I was watcing naked men on my computer. Tey won't stop tinking tat I was watcing gay porn. FML
Today , I drove past a fragrant steakhouse an my mouth began to water an my stomach started rumbling,hich would've been perfectly fine if it wasn't for the fact that I'm a vegan an an animal lover . My confused body craves burning flesh . FML
Today, My Husband's Car Was Stolen From Our Driveway While He Was Out Jogging. We'd Recently Had A Huge Fight, And He Accused Me Of Having Done This To Get Revenge. I Was At Work All Day, But It Seems This Doesn't Make Any Difference To His Dumb, Paranoid Ass. Real FML
today a neo-Nazi stopped me an commented on blue eyes an blonde hair. He went on to explain that I could be "pure", an should follow him an other Aryans in the campaign to eliminate Jews, an other "abominations". Good thing he didn't see the Star of David necklace around neck. FML
2day I cummed home from work to 3 year old daughter sniffing the rug in the living room. When I asked herhat she was doing she said "Daddy smell this." So I went, got on knees and bent down to smell it and she pushed face in the dog crap smeared in the rug. FML
Friday 27 March 2015