About nukeacat : Has had three open heart surgeries.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Today, I found out that I'm allergic to bacon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50780) - you deserved it (3670)
On 07/07/2012 at 12:45am - health - by Dammit - United States (California)
Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8277) - you deserved it (15979)
On 07/07/2012 at 12:08am - misc - by totallyembarassed - United States (North Carolina)
Today, after backpacking acrossing Europe for a month, I picked up my dog from the doghouse. No one will listen to me or acknowledge the fact that he's now missing two toes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25602) - you deserved it (1613)
On 07/05/2012 at 12:30pm - animals - by tagteam - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, while taking the trash out, the old cranky elevator in my apartment complex finally gave up on life. For a long hour I was stuck between floors 4 and 5, practically embracing my bio-waste can. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13578) - you deserved it (1036)
On 07/05/2012 at 7:52am - misc - by Kazenoe - Finland (Western Finland)
Today, my wife, who is four months pregnant, burst into tears while thinking about the armchair in our living room that we never use. According to her, we're stopping it from living out its destiny as an armchair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19649) - you deserved it (2171) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 07/05/2012 at 4:11am - misc - by FauteuilEver Alone (man) - France
Today, I walked into my roommate's room to ask him a question, only to see a pitcher with over a pint of urine in it sitting on his bookcase. This is at least the fifth conversation in a year I've had with him about not peeing in containers in his room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13969) - you deserved it (1114)
On 07/04/2012 at 10:55pm - misc - by notestojenn - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, what started as my mom calling my grandma for a recipe turned into them discussing the philosophical reason behind my baking. I apparently picked up baking because I'm depressed over unemployment. And here I thought I just liked the smell of baked goods. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12481) - you deserved it (997)
On 07/04/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by Shortcake (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I was at the airport. I was on my way to see my dad for the first time since I was 4. Whilst I was waiting for my dad to find me, a strange man started flirting with me. Irritated, I told him I was waiting for my dad to get me, and to f*ck off. The strange man was my father. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29103) - you deserved it (2900)
On 07/03/2012 at 7:01pm - misc - by BunniesOnAcid - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I was having an argument with my girlfriend in front of our friends. I didn't want her to spoil my good time, so I ignored her until she disappeared. She re-appeared thirty minutes later just to throw a punch that would make Muhammad Ali jealous. Our friends' reaction? They clapped. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6215) - you deserved it (34276)
On 07/03/2012 at 7:51am - misc - by ali (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I asked the 7-year-old that I was babysitting if he could burp on command. He said he could, and began to demonstrate. It turns out he couldn't purposely burp, but he definitely could vomit on command. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5818) - you deserved it (16210)
On 07/03/2012 at 7:33am - kids - by ew (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, as I was getting ready to go to the midnight premiere of the new Spiderman movie, I was actually bitten by a spider. He gets super powers and a hot girl, I swell up like a balloon and get to spend the night in the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20635) - you deserved it (1406)
On 07/03/2012 at 4:03am - misc - by spiderfail - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I'm going to court to give an eyewitness account of a robbery. Unfortunately, I had a wacky dream last night concerning the robbery, and no longer have any idea of what actually happened in real life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23099) - you deserved it (2205)
On 07/03/2012 at 2:22am - misc - by Dreamer (man) - United States (California)
Today, my mom called to chew me out for having my sister arrested. My sister broke into my apartment, rearranged my living room, and claimed she now lived with me. She then threatened me with a butcher's knife for not appreciating what she had done. My mom wants me to pay the bail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26772) - you deserved it (1546)
On 07/03/2012 at 1:36am - misc - by needmorelocks - United States (California)
Today, I moved back home after unsuccessfully trying to find work in Florida, despite living there for nine months. About 45 minutes into my 18-hour drive home, a TV station called me to offer me a job interview. I applied for that job over three months ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16574) - you deserved it (1386)
On 07/02/2012 at 10:22pm - work - by deweyd8855 - United States
Today, my dad was helping my fiancé and me move. On the way, someone sideswiped the trailer. When the police came, we found my dad had a suspended license, no insurance, and a broken tail light. No one else could drive a manual, so we were stuck in a parking lot for 3 hours. Thanks, dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12094) - you deserved it (3661)
On 07/02/2012 at 9:20pm - misc - by thanksdad (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Monday 20 May 2013
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