About nukeacat : Has had three open heart surgeries.
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nukeacat's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 04/03/2013 at 5:17am / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 04/02/2013 at 3:24am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work
by QuinnyZebrass / 04/02/2013 at 12:11am / United States (Arizona) / Work
by aabadaba / 04/01/2013 at 1:23am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to proof-read a terrible paper containing a bunch of mistakes. It took me 4 hours and I didn't eat dinner until I was done. His response when he got it back was, "What the fuck did you do to my paper?! You bitch!" FML
by pissed_off_girl / 03/31/2013 at 10:59pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, one of my 5-year-old son's teeth fell out, but he's quite scatterbrained and he lost it. He did however find my vibrating duck under my pillow, and is now crying because he thinks that I stole his tooth so that the tooth fairy would bring me a toy. FML
by laptitesouris / 03/31/2013 at 7:35pm / France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur) / Kids
by jll14 / 03/31/2013 at 6:27pm / Malaysia (Sabah) / Miscellaneous
Today, what started as a fun family Easter egg hunt turned within minutes into my mother-in-law's big chance to be a dramatic cow by screaming at my 5 and 7-year-old daughters for participating in a "vile pagan ritual" and saying that we're all going to hell. They're still bawling. FML
by Anonymous / 03/31/2013 at 4:34pm / United States (Indiana) / Kids
Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML
by The_Black_Jesus / 03/31/2013 at 9:32am / United States / Kids
Today, a blonde tourist came up to me and asked me for directions to the nearest train station. I politely directed her there, and she left. Five minutes later, she came back and slapped me for not bringing her to an "English-speaking station". We're in China, lady. FML
by dumb tourists / 03/31/2013 at 2:19am / China (Beijing) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/31/2013 at 1:10am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/30/2013 at 1:23am / United States / Miscellaneous
by Badam / 03/29/2013 at 9:29pm / France (Aquitaine) / Love
by TheRuleEnforcer / 03/29/2013 at 4:33am / United States / Transportation
by Hooker / 03/28/2013 at 7:58pm / United States / Intimacy
- Today, I woke up from a drunken one-night-stand. The person I slept with turned out to be heavily… Today, I sent my grandma a naked picture instead of my girlfriend. While attempting to delete it, I… Today, I hooked up with the guy I've been seeing. Apparently he doesn't believe in condoms and took…