nonentity21

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nonentity21

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5902
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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nonentity21's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:11pm<b>rubina</b> - the 10/20/2010 at 11:24am

nonentity21's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

nonentity21's favorite FMLs

Today, I was making out with a guy I really like. Midway through, he stopped and said he had to sneeze. After waiting several seconds, he said the urge went away and we kept making out. Ten seconds later, he violently sneezed in my open mouth. FML

by Achoo / 10/15/2009 at 3:07am / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, the bird that has been stuck in my roof for two days, keeping me awake at night, finally flew out of the roof and into the house. As I was opening the door to send it outside, it flew straight back up into the roof. FML

by birdhater / 10/15/2009 at 2:16am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

Today, the bird that has been stuck in my roof for two days, keeping me awake at night, finally flew out of the roof and into the house. As I was opening the door to send it outside, it flew straight back up into the roof. FML

by birdhater / 10/15/2009 at 2:16am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend accidentally called me from his pocket. I thought it would be funny to see what him and his friends were talking about. I laughed when I heard him talking about us fooling around until I realized it wasn't me. FML

by Em / 10/15/2009 at 2:12am / Love

Today, my boyfriend accidentally called me from his pocket. I thought it would be funny to see what him and his friends were talking about. I laughed when I heard him talking about us fooling around until I realized it wasn't me. FML

by Em / 10/15/2009 at 2:12am / Love

Today, I was involved in a wreck. How quickly did the police arrive at the scene? Very quickly, considering he was the one who rear-ended me at a red light. FML

by gooddriver / 10/14/2009 at 11:18pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was involved in a wreck. How quickly did the police arrive at the scene? Very quickly, considering he was the one who rear-ended me at a red light. FML

by gooddriver / 10/14/2009 at 11:18pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a woman yelled at me to stop following her around the store. We were in IKEA. The only way to get through the store is to follow the arrows through a one-way path. Apparently, no one informed her of this. FML

by creepystalkerguy / 10/14/2009 at 2:19pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

by Anonymous / 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back in the kitchen. How does she respond? By doing what I told her to do, and returning to hit me with a frying pan. FML

by PanFace / 10/13/2009 at 2:54am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, after I have spent $3,000 dollars in preparations to move in with my girlfriend of 2 and 1/2 years, she confesses she's a mental patient who stole someone elses identity. She was telling the truth. FML

by IMayBeAFool / 10/13/2009 at 2:38am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking a bubble bath, and had my iPod touch on the side of my bathtub so I could listen to my music. My dog walked up to the side of the tub, looked me in the eye, and nudged my iPod into the water. FML

by bubbles / 10/12/2009 at 1:36am / United States / Animals

Today, I went in my room to play my guitar. I found my Les Paul on the floor with all the strings missing. I later found out my grandma cut them off because I was playing "Devil's Music." FML

by cbarebo / 10/11/2009 at 1:21pm / United States (West Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife got the flu. While she was sleeping, I went out to buy her some soup and other things. When I was walking back through the door, she woke up, thought I was a burglar, and threw the closest thing to her at me. What was it? A cactus. FML

by prickly / 10/11/2009 at 12:48pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a music festival when a group of idiots decided to push over a port-a-loo (portable toilet). I rushed over and tried to hold it up to save the person inside from a very messy and embarrasing scene. Not only did the door open, covering me in excrement, but there was no-one inside. FML

by good-samaritan-fail / 10/06/2009 at 11:56am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous