ninjaCarebear

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ninjaCarebear

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 July 1998 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 9049
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About ninjaCarebear : I made this account when I was about 11 so sorry for the horrible name. I'm on here quite a bit quietly voting in the shadows.

ninjaCarebear's page activity

Visits<b>Talis99</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 1:38am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 4:07am<b>kpetrovski</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 9:59am<b>NoNamedBrilliant</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 1:21am<b>moophasa</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 11:23pm<b>codyflanders2008</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 8:54pm<b>OnlyAvailableID</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 9:48pm<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 10:00pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 1:48pm<b>BaconCat5</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 2:50am<b>FraserAlvisio</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 5:06am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 11:21am<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 8:13pm<b>tbro47</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 6:55pm<b>eatdaussy69lol</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 1:10am<b>REALAfroninga</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 6:59pm<b>junkman6</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 10:51am<b>MichellinMan</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 3:31pm

ninjaCarebear's FML badges

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You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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ninjaCarebear's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss's cat died. I'm expected to attend the service. FML

by whymyliferose / 06/03/2011 at 12:47am / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, I was complimented on my hat by two different people. I wasn't wearing a hat. FML

by AndieApocalypse / 06/03/2011 at 12:21am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I got fired via text. The last sentence was, "Wish you the best, take care!" FML

by amf / 06/02/2011 at 11:08pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Work

Today, whilst at my job as a lifeguard, a small child decided he couldn't hold it any longer and released his bowels in the pool. It was my job to clean up his dump, including the floating pieces of sweetcorn. FML

by corn / 06/02/2011 at 9:44pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Work

Today, I saw a woman run down my street screaming, "Fuck you cops! I can drive under the influence if I want to!" It took me a second to realize it was my mother. FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2011 at 9:07pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went speed dating. I arrived at my first date and she looked me up and down and said, "Oh, that's awkward." FML

by nikto / 06/02/2011 at 9:01pm / Love

Today, I got to see my son's dream of being on television come true. Unfortunately, it was because he'd been arrested for trying to rob a bank. FML

by fuck / 06/02/2011 at 2:43pm / United States / Kids

Today, I flew home to Germany to see my wife before I'm deployed, only to find her in bed with another guy. She explained that she wants us to stay together, but she can't take a year without being intimate with someone. FML

by jsalmons / 06/02/2011 at 1:39pm / Germany (Bayern) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I went shooting. While I was showing him how to properly hold and adjust a rifle, he accidentally pulled the trigger. The gun kicked back and hit me in the face, breaking my nose. FML

by raebelle / 06/02/2011 at 1:32pm / United States / Health

Today, while I was in the shower, my curious cat jumped in. She decided she really doesn't like showers and to avoid getting wet, used my naked body as a makeshift tree. FML

by brittaneejanex / 06/02/2011 at 12:06pm / United States / Animals

Today, I had an orgasm for the first time in almost 3 months. My husband was beaming, saying he had given it his all and was ecstatic that he had finally satisfied me. But to be honest, I'd remembered we had a bag of potato chips in the kitchen. FML

by satisfied88 / 06/02/2011 at 10:49am / Intimacy

Today, my dad came to visit me. By visit I mean he arrived, took a huge smelly dump and left. This is the first time I've seen my dad in months. FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2011 at 10:10am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was shopping for clothes. I thought this guy was a mannequin because he was standing perfectly still. I poked him and he screamed like a girl. FML

by ohcrap / 06/02/2011 at 6:05am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, we finally got wireless Internet. My mom won't let us open any doors or windows in fear that it might "let the Internet out". It's 103 degrees in here. FML

by meyo555 / 06/02/2011 at 5:45am / United States (Nebraska) / Health

Today, I was released from hospital after being in a car accident. I used the phone book to call people I know to get a ride home, as my wallet and cellphone were still in the wrecked car. I had called my mom to come get me, but her response was "I don't feel like it." I live with her. FML

by thanksmom / 06/02/2011 at 5:27am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous