About ninjaCarebear : I made this account when I was about 11 so sorry for the horrible name guys.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, I found out that if a cop asks you if you have any weapons, and you reply by saying "only these guns" while flexing your biceps, they won't take it very well. And neither will the cops down at the station. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9217) - you deserved it (31795)
On 12/06/2011 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous -
Today, a 65 year old toothless gas station attendant asked me out on a date in exchange for free gas, and I said yes. This is what my unemployment has come to. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24787) - you deserved it (5676)
On 12/06/2011 at 2:03am - money - by BrokeandDesperate (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my husband and I got into an argument. I tried to assault him with a laptop. He yelled, "Don't hit me with the computer." My apartment neighbor yelled through the wall, "Do what you gotta do, girl." FML
I agree, your life sucks (10940) - you deserved it (27559)
On 12/05/2011 at 9:31pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I farted in front of my husband for the first time in 26 years. He told our kids over email, and now they won't shut up about it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20809) - you deserved it (6603)
On 12/05/2011 at 1:13am - health - by lol (woman) - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, my parents bought purity rings for my twin brother and me for our birthday, and had them blessed by our priest. Neither of us are virgins. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34589) - you deserved it (7884)
On 12/05/2011 at 12:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I cleaned my toilet. I had forgotten it was white. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4898) - you deserved it (30032)
On 12/04/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, while I was watching TV, my boyfriend took my unicorn pillow pet and made it hump my arm. I told him to stop acting like a child. He replied, "Children don't have sex like this," and started making sex noises while making the pillow pet hump my arm faster and harder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22076) - you deserved it (7668)
On 12/04/2011 at 8:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, the girl I've had a crush on for years asked if I could be her "emergency gay friend". Worst part? I said yes. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19837) - you deserved it (16324)
On 12/04/2011 at 3:36am - love - by lifesucksbigtimefuys - United Kingdom (Devon)
Today, I was having a rough day and decided to go out for a walk at 1 a.m. to clear my head. I ended up being driven home by two cops, who thought I was prostituting myself at the truck stop. When we arrived, they had a nice conversation with my parents. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24106) - you deserved it (3717)
On 12/04/2011 at 2:46am - misc - by D (woman) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my boyfriend was disgusted because I dropped a Skittle on the floor and ate it. He thought peeing on me in the shower was just fine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28247) - you deserved it (4226)
On 12/04/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I went to the doctor for a check up, having had a head injury a week ago and suffering some memory loss. Turns out, the medicine he gave me for my head has memory loss as a side effect. He then said "I told you. Don't you remember?" After I said no he said "I figured." and giggled. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21089) - you deserved it (1684)
On 12/04/2011 at 2:04am - health - by memoryloss (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I played Taboo with my boyfriend and my conservative family. It was my boyfriend's turn and his word was "cherry". His only clue to me was, "I popped your..." He was the only one who found it funny. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29742) - you deserved it (3718)
On 12/04/2011 at 12:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was driving my drunk best friend and his "new friend" back to his house. Halfway, this new friend started to give him head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23355) - you deserved it (2441)
On 12/04/2011 at 12:35am - intimacy - by aninnocentonlooker - United States (California)
Today, a man tried to rob the winery I worked at by knife-point. I managed to scare him off by throwing a bottle of wine at him. My boss fired me because I broke a $25 bottle of wine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31713) - you deserved it (1741)
On 12/04/2011 at 12:19am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was at my job as a bartender where I had to listen to a 40-something man with no legs drunkenly explain just how much he loves nipples. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20493) - you deserved it (2443)
On 12/03/2011 at 8:39pm - intimacy - by sugarbeet - United States (Minnesota)
Monday 20 May 2013
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