ninjaCarebear

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ninjaCarebear

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 July 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 11022
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About ninjaCarebear : I made this account when I was about 11 so sorry for the horrible name. I'm on here quite a bit quietly voting in the shadows.

ninjaCarebear's page activity

Visits<b>Talis99</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 1:38am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 02/12/2016 at 4:07am<b>kpetrovski</b> - the 06/25/2015 at 9:59am<b>NoNamedBrilliant</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 1:21am<b>moophasa</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 11:23pm<b>codyflanders2008</b> - the 02/02/2015 at 8:54pm<b>OnlyAvailableID</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 9:48pm<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 10:00pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 1:48pm<b>BaconCat5</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 2:50am<b>FraserAlvisio</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 5:06am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 11:21am<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 03/03/2014 at 8:13pm<b>tbro47</b> - the 03/01/2014 at 6:55pm<b>eatdaussy69lol</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 1:10am<b>REALAfroninga</b> - the 01/10/2014 at 6:59pm<b>junkman6</b> - the 01/02/2014 at 10:51am<b>MichellinMan</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 3:31pm

ninjaCarebear's FML badges

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You have thumbed 5000 comments.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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ninjaCarebear's favorite FMLs

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML

by ugh / 01/30/2012 at 7:25pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, the quality of my sex life reached a new low. I faked my orgasm. And so did he. FML

by sosadbuttrue / 01/14/2012 at 8:15am / Switzerland (Glarus) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I have never read any of the Harry Potter books. FML

by Nate / 01/12/2012 at 12:36am / United States / Love

Today, despite being 21 years old and living in my own place, my mom still managed to walk in on me whacking off. FML

by ikungfuyou / 12/27/2011 at 2:11am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I found out that, when mad at us, my son picks the tops off his shoulder-pimples and sprinkles them in our food. FML

by Pimpleeater / 12/20/2011 at 2:45am / New Zealand (Wellington) / Kids

Today, a Karate dojo opened under my apartment. It's like living in a Bruce Lee movie. FML

by rattlingfloorboards / 12/15/2011 at 12:09am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2011 at 6:54am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2011 at 6:54am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the pool with my new white bathers. I felt really good about myself because everyone was staring at me until this hot guy came up to me and said "Dude, your bathers are see-through. You need to shave!" FML

by Embarrassed Swimmer / 12/11/2011 at 2:23am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was getting dressed in my bedroom with the blinds open and had nothing covering my top half. I thought my neighbours wouldn't be able to see in through all the trees, that was until I heard someone wolf whistle and one of my neighbours running away. FML

by nakedness / 12/10/2011 at 8:35pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was with my boyfriend and we were talking about childhood memories. He told me about a girl he made fun of in middle school. That was me. FML

by Anonymous / 12/10/2011 at 8:03pm / United States / Love

Today, I walked in on my mom, braiding my dad's pubic hair. I don't know what scarred me more; my mom braiding his pubic hair or the fact that his pubic hair is long enough to be braided. FML

by Joe / 12/10/2011 at 8:03pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, my creepy, stalker ex-girlfriend was given an anonymous love letter. She's convinced it's from me. FML

by DJ / 12/10/2011 at 8:01pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, my boyfriend forced me to climb out through his window, because he was too embarrassed at the thought of his room-mate finding out I'd spent the night. FML

by FML / 12/10/2011 at 6:56pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I got my first driving lesson from my dad. We traded seats, I started the car and his entire lesson was, "Go." FML

by Maggie / 12/10/2011 at 11:45am / Canada (New Brunswick) / Miscellaneous