About ninjaCarebear : I made this account when I was about 11 so sorry for the horrible name. I'm on here quite a bit quietly voting in the shadows.
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ninjaCarebear's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 09/14/2012 at 4:47pm / New Zealand (Otago) / Health
by darawbs / 09/09/2012 at 8:39pm / United States / Work
Today, I got a phone call out of the blue from a young man, who screamed that he was going to kill me for sleeping with his fiancée. I told him I am a 49-year-old man who hasn't been laid since my wife passed away, four years ago. He stammered, shouted "Well she was a slut too" and hung up. FML
by Anonymous / 08/17/2012 at 8:20pm / United States / Love
by LOTRfail / 07/26/2012 at 10:13pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 07/25/2012 at 6:54am / United States (California) / Kids
by Wwiimaniac / 06/25/2012 at 10:05am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I made a phone call in my office to my doctor. He wanted to call a prescription to my pharmacy, but wanted to know by what method I would prefer my medication. During our conversation, a group of potential clients walked in just as I exclaimed "I definitely prefer oral." FML
by me / 06/22/2012 at 3:28am / United States (Indiana) / Work
by thefailwhale / 06/16/2012 at 12:58am / United States (Wisconsin) / Love
Today, I was showing some new karate moves in the park to my friends. I mimed a punch behind a girl walking past to show my technique and control, but she must have seen me. She turned around and kicked me in the stomach. To add insult to injury, her technique was better than mine. FML
by Karate Kid / 05/25/2012 at 2:29am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by mhm / 05/05/2012 at 10:21pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
Today, it was my wedding day. With my best friend as the priest, she asked, "Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?" After saying I do, she then turned to him and asked, "Do you want to bang my friend?" Everyone laughed, except my already disapproving father. FML
by gottalovefriends / 04/23/2012 at 12:04am / United States (New Hampshire) / Love
by MI3 / 04/19/2012 at 3:34am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by ouchouchouch / 03/28/2012 at 12:16am / Canada (Manitoba) / Miscellaneous
by jmac / 03/10/2012 at 10:06pm / United States (California) / Health
by Crying / 02/29/2012 at 3:21pm / United States (Michigan) / Geek
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…