Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

nikkipettyfer

Offline (4 hours ago) | Search for a member

nikkipettyfer

151Liked!

nikkipettyfernikkipettyfer
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5021
  • Number of comments : 80
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 30 posted

About nikkipettyfer : I'm a model at Wilhelmina modeling agency

nikkipettyfer's page activity

Visits<b>Ed1998</b> - 20 hours ago<b>arasx0</b> - yesterday at 5:56pm<b>zoulou48</b> - yesterday at 1:06pm<b>scottyboy417</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 3:44pm<b>MxAxRxCxO</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 6:38pm<b>Mpineda57</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 3:16am<b>Hero2457</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 7:23am<b>ebarton14</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 12:27am<b>firefighterbee</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 11:38pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 11:36pm<b>ToxicLover29</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 9:43pm<b>LeBandit</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 3:50pm<b>Brandi_Faith</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 3:05pm<b>Magnettik</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 11:26am<b>robsmit98</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 10:37am<b>rkdstp1995</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 10:11am<b>CRAAAGCFDCRA</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 7:52am<b>gary8082</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 7:32am

Liked!<b>Mpineda57</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 8:16am<b>ebarton14</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 5:27am<b>rkdstp1995</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 3:11pm<b>Markovski</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 9:52am<b>DerBuchmacher</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 9:29am<b>maximus_prime</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 12:58pm<b>ninjakitty254</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 11:17am<b>martin8337</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 6:59am<b>Jake42100</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 6:08am<b>jmcgee17</b> - the 03/21/2015 at 5:33am<b>seenoevil818</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 10:28pm<b>mzcupcakez</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 9:27pm<b>NateC27</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 7:27pm<b>akkianjum</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 7:23pm<b>thelaughinator</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 1:37pm<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 10:08pm<b>lolonewsom</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 12:54am<b>ckeekymontag</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 12:05am

nikkipettyfer's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of nikkipettyfer's badges

nikkipettyfer's favorite FMLs

Today, my grandmother opened the bathroom door to find me eating a spoonful of Nutella while on the toilet. She is convinced that I was eating my own shit and will not stop telling everybody. They believe her. FML

#20882660
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27699) - you deserved it (40444)

On 09/15/2013 at 5:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55116) - you deserved it (27680)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I was standing in line at the grocery store waiting for my husband. After a while, I feel him kissing my neck, so I turn to tell him that it's not appropriate in public. It wasn't my husband. FML

#20878205
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58485) - you deserved it (4180)

On 09/12/2013 at 10:44am - love - by whyme (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML

#20877041
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57416) - you deserved it (9339)

On 09/11/2013 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through my birthday card. FML

#20871364
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62974) - you deserved it (3705)

On 09/07/2013 at 12:08pm - love - by brycepetrillo - United States (Florida)

Today, I'm trapped in my apartment. My new cat won't let me leave. Every time I try, he blocks the door, hisses and tries to savage me. I'm my own cat's bitch. FML

#20864719
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45334) - you deserved it (19283)

On 09/02/2013 at 3:22pm - animals - by aherdofpigs - United States

Today, my friend told me she turned down a job as a babysitter because she didn't want to be secretly videotaped, as she knew the people had a nanny cam. I wasn't aware of this when I took that same job a few nights ago and asked my boyfriend to come by. We had sex on their couch. FML

#20862871
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26844) - you deserved it (92586)

On 09/01/2013 at 5:57am - intimacy - by happyturtle (woman) - Croatia

Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML

#20862305
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56552) - you deserved it (6019)

On 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by SplishSplash (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old standing over me with a pillow. I asked him what he was doing, and he replied that he and Steve were playing a game, but Steve said I have to be asleep for it. Steve is my son's imaginary friend. I'm convinced Steve wants to kill me. FML

#20842823
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52236) - you deserved it (3133)

On 08/18/2013 at 5:37am - kids - by DrtySnchez - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went downstairs a little after midnight to grab a snack, and in the dark hallway, I clearly saw a small child walk into the kitchen. I was freaked out, but I followed him in. There was nobody in the room. I'm now too scared to sleep, and am seriously considering moving house. FML

#20841635
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54982) - you deserved it (4593)

On 08/17/2013 at 12:27pm - misc - by fsfs (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, my 17-year-old son came home with a black eye saying he ran into a pole at school. I asked the principal if we could see the tapes. He actually did run straight into a pole. And not just once, twice. FML

Today, out of partying reflex, I downed Communion wine like a vodka shot. FML

#20830409
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22846) - you deserved it (44215)

On 08/10/2013 at 6:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was in the shower with my boyfriend, and things started to get heated. That's where it all went to hell; I slipped and fell, bringing down with me the curtain and grooming products, and putting my back out. There goes my sex life. FML

#20829515
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45927) - you deserved it (6662)

On 08/09/2013 at 6:23pm - intimacy - by hunchback of notre bite (woman) - Korea, Republic of

Today, I wore a bikini to the lake with my parents. I didn't know that my back was covered in bruises, and ended up having to awkwardly explain to my parents that I am not in an abusive relationship; the bruises came from the sex I had last night. FML

#20822120
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51575) - you deserved it (14594)

On 08/05/2013 at 1:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend's parents found out we had a sleepover while they were on vacation. His dog had retrieved the underwear I had unknowingly left and brought them to his mom. FML

#20821459
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37539) - you deserved it (16986)

On 08/05/2013 at 1:28am - animals - by fetch boy.. - United States (New York)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: