About nikkipettyfer : I'm a model at Wilhelmina modeling agency
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
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Today, I was getting ready, when I heard my dad in the shower. He was singing along to the song "The Wheel in the Sky" by Journey. Except he'd changed the lyrics and was singing, "The dick on this guy needs a rubbin'." It turns out my mom was in the shower with him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51357) - you deserved it (3348)
On 05/01/2013 at 12:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my parents decided to wake me up on my birthday. They flashed the lights and yanked off my bed sheets. I sleep naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46835) - you deserved it (9279)
On 04/28/2013 at 9:16am - misc - by Beth - United States (North Carolina)
Today, my parents decided to wake me up on my birthday. They flashed the lights and yanked off my bed sheets. I sleep naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46835) - you deserved it (9279)
On 04/28/2013 at 9:16am - misc - by Beth - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I was getting ready to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It seems he thought I was a much larger cup size than I really am, because when he saw my actual boobs, he said, "Aaaaaaand they're gone". FML
I agree, your life sucks (51652) - you deserved it (10250)
On 04/27/2013 at 12:11am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my seven-year-old nephew challenged me to a push up contest in front of my girlfriend. He beat me, and then asked my girlfriend why she's dating a pussy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45461) - you deserved it (18560)
On 04/24/2013 at 12:55am - kids - by BIGCHEIFAAA (man) - United States (California)
Today, it has been over 3 months since my housemates ended their 1 month long relationship. He's still creepily obsessed with her. He picked the bathroom lock when I was in the shower and tried to get in, and then called me a "fucking c*nt" when he realised it was me in there, not her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46596) - you deserved it (3651)
On 04/19/2013 at 7:44am - misc - by pleasekillme (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)
Today, I woke up to my brother chopping all my bangs off. When I yelled at him, he could only shout back, "You can see clearly now, the bangs are gone!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (44181) - you deserved it (7049)
On 04/17/2013 at 12:13pm - kids - by my dumb bro - United States (Arkansas)
Today, at the exact moment that I leaned over to show my dad a picture on my phone, my boyfriend texted me: "I'm no weather man, but you can expect a few inches tonight." FML
I agree, your life sucks (55123) - you deserved it (10101)
On 04/17/2013 at 1:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend confessed that she had drunkenly slept with another guy last night. Since she seemed genuinely upset, and had confessed right away, I decided to forgive her the slip-up. She then angrily broke up with me, because "if I really loved her, I would've been more angry." FML
I agree, your life sucks (58269) - you deserved it (9474)
On 04/16/2013 at 9:27am - intimacy - by notacaveman (man) - Netherlands
Today, I was about to break up with my psycho girlfriend. As I sat her down, she told me she wanted to show me something. She then took off her shirt to reveal my name tattooed across her chest. FML
I agree, your life sucks (60212) - you deserved it (6192)
On 04/16/2013 at 3:23am - love - by guess I'm stuck - United States (California)
Today, my husband of 6 years said in a grave voice that he had some important news for me. Jokingly, I said, "Why, did you get that cute colleague of yours pregnant?" He did. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62594) - you deserved it (5240)
On 04/15/2013 at 2:36pm - love - by wow (woman) - Russian Federation (Saint Petersburg City)
Today, while trying to find my phone in the depths of the sheets on my bed, I gave my comforter a huge shake. A second later, I heard a crash. My phone had miraculously flown straight into the glass of water on my nightstand. Found it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34772) - you deserved it (7263)
On 04/15/2013 at 12:25pm - misc - by Reno - United States (Nevada)
Today, I was taking a walk, when an elderly lady in a motorized wheelchair slammed into me from behind. There was plenty of room to pass by, but noooo, trying to run me down like a dog, then giving me the finger and yelling "Watch where you're walking!" is so damn preferable. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37065) - you deserved it (3249)
On 04/14/2013 at 6:20pm - health - by danman (man) - United States
Today, my sister went into a blind rage at me for "upstaging" her by announcing that I'm pregnant, two months after she did the same. My husband and I have been trying for two years. She's in high school and doesn't even know who the father is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62481) - you deserved it (2571)
On 04/14/2013 at 4:39pm - misc - by bntje (woman) - Netherlands (Overijssel)
Today, trying to be friendly, I said good morning to the creepy guy at work. He responded by wordlessly hugging me. I was touched, until I realized he was trying to unhook my bra. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41636) - you deserved it (6736)
On 04/13/2013 at 9:14pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Monday 17 June 2013
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