Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

nikkipettyfer

Online | Search for a member

nikkipettyfer

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1588
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 28 posted

About nikkipettyfer : I'm a model at Wilhelmina modeling agency

nikkipettyfer's page activity

Visits<b>lisaint</b> - 2 hours ago<b>cats54321</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 7:09pm<b>lexiale</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 7:08pm<b>wowdoge</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 2:19am<b>19Rachel97</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 2:19pm<b>PhantomScore</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 4:22am<b>colby6666</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 6:14pm<b>gaetan03xx</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 1:15am<b>AFCCT</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 1:37pm<b>footbowl</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 1:08pm<b>okcnation</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 10:28pm<b>Zaketh2112</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 6:31pm<b>mixedone223</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 5:16pm<b>hurryHM</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 4:39pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 4:10pm<b>chrisseesyou</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 3:28pm<b>Ayezed</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 2:26pm<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 10:59am

nikkipettyfer's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

See all of nikkipettyfer's badges

nikkipettyfer's favorite FMLs

Today, I bought some noise-canceling headphones. They work well. Too well. My mom came home, unpacked her shopping, walked upstairs, knocked on my door, opened my door, and found me jacking off to a porno, all without me hearing a thing. Fucking hell. FML

#21246585
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31998) - you deserved it (30186)

On 08/27/2014 at 5:50pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got my wisdom teeth removed. All I can remember is crying to my mom because I thought spoons were taking over the world. FML

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47994) - you deserved it (9436)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42534) - you deserved it (7394)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when we heard a screech. My two cats were having it harder than us. FML

#21241441
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40214) - you deserved it (5320)

On 08/20/2014 at 2:07am - intimacy - by Mia (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, it's the 16th day of my period. FML

#21241406
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63059) - you deserved it (4092)

On 08/20/2014 at 1:15am - health - by BagelTheOtaku (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to a job interview, and a guy ahead of me went to enter the building, only to walk face-first into a glass door. I rushed to help him up, and after we had a good laugh about it, I turned to walk inside, only to walk straight into the door as well. FML

#21236025
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41000) - you deserved it (8820)

On 08/12/2014 at 5:23pm - health - by facefuckedguy (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I let my coworker use my PC during lunch, because his was having problems. A few hours later, my boss called me into his office and gave me hell for apparently looking at furry porn during lunch break. He won't believe my explanation. For fuck's sake, Dave. FML

Today, I found out the hard way that no good girlfriend-boyfriend conversation ever started with, "Suppose I slept with your best friend..." FML

#21229506
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39142) - you deserved it (7876)

On 08/04/2014 at 7:04pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had to give a video presentation. My video was on animal abuse, but I somehow played a video of myself singing Britney Spears in my room. FML

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49030) - you deserved it (21196)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my girlfriend came back from camping with her friends. I say "friends", I mean "friend". And when I say "friend", I mean "her ex". I took a look through her bag afterwards, and well, who knew condoms were considered camping equipment these days. FML

#21222062
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51888) - you deserved it (5977)

On 07/27/2014 at 1:12pm - love - by fingwhore (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had a rough day and was extremely tired. I took a nap on the couch, and woke up to a guy robbing my house. I pretended I was still sleeping, waiting a chance to grab him or run out safely. I ended up falling back asleep. FML

#21219246
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41511) - you deserved it (21365)

On 07/24/2014 at 11:59am - misc - by FML - United States (Virginia)

Today, as I was on the couch taking a nap, it started violently shaking. I panicked and chased my family outside, convinced it was an earthquake. It was just the cat trapped inside the couch. FML

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50492) - you deserved it (6616)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: