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nihongoso

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nihongoso

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nihongoso's page activity

Visits<b>SerpentBoy</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 5:53pm

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nihongoso's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to my favorite burger joint. Upon taking the first bite of my burger, I dislocated my jaw, and the waiters had to call 911. FML

#19990108
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21231) - you deserved it (2294)

On 07/29/2012 at 1:15am - health - by cherknobil (man) - United States (California)

Today, I began to daydream about going on a diet and losing some weight. As I did so, I unknowingly reached for a giant bag of chips and ate the whole thing. Now, I have stopped daydreaming and am sitting alone and depressed. And I'm all out of chips. FML

#19990099
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9649) - you deserved it (24781)

On 07/29/2012 at 1:12am - misc - by daydreamer (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I finally lost my virginity, all while in the passionate throes of an asthma attack. FML

#19989315
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25533) - you deserved it (2870)

On 07/28/2012 at 4:38pm - intimacy - by feminista (woman) - Guatemala (Guatemala)

Today, I asked my best friend if he would do me the honour of becoming my son's godfather. He replied, "Um, that's just rude. You know I'm an atheist." Huh? FML

#19989164
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21788) - you deserved it (7541)

On 07/28/2012 at 2:29pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went on an overnight airplane flight. I wanted to be comfy so I took off my shorts, threw a blanket over myself, and slept. When the lights came back on, I ran to the bathroom before they served food. After using the bathroom, I noticed I hadn't put my shorts back on. FML

#19988832
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6051) - you deserved it (36329)

On 07/28/2012 at 9:26am - misc - by anonymous - Lebanon

Today, my live-in-boyfriend lost his job. Jokingly, I told him that we weren't going to have sex until he found a new job. He then turned to me with the most excited look I have ever seen on his face and said "I am going to stay unemployed forever!" He was serious. FML

#19987101
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27190) - you deserved it (8338)

On 07/27/2012 at 9:45am - intimacy - by Nikki (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while working as a manager at a restaurant, the "All employees must wash hands" sign in the bathroom was stolen. Now my employees won't wash their hands because they "don't have to." FML

#19986926
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22717) - you deserved it (2175)

On 07/27/2012 at 5:25am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my iPhone got back from being fixed. When I opened the box there was a note attached to my phone that said, "All you had to do was turn it on." FML

#19986553
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5898) - you deserved it (37276)

On 07/27/2012 at 1:05am - misc - by ryanharp2 - United States (Arkansas)

Today, at my job, an old lady kept calling her inhaler a blow job. I kindly explained to her why she couldn't call her inhaler that. She continued to ask me for a blow job in front of visitors. I had to say yes. FML

#19986519
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27642) - you deserved it (2370)

On 07/27/2012 at 12:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, the power went out in my area. My wife and I were bored so I lit some candles, poured some wine, and left little to her imagination about what my intent was. We cuddled a while and as I leaned in for a kiss the power came back on. She was more excited that the WiFi was back than anything. FML

#19986265
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23244) - you deserved it (2010)

On 07/26/2012 at 10:55pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my husband and I were watching Lord of the Rings. My husband told me he sees the eye of Sauron every time he goes down on me. FML

#19986172
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24801) - you deserved it (3565)

On 07/26/2012 at 10:13pm - intimacy - by LOTRfail (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realised just how cripplingly self-conscious I am, when I couldn't even fantasise about having sex with a guy without feeling shy and insecure about my body. FML

#19985398
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27304) - you deserved it (4928)

On 07/26/2012 at 2:07pm - intimacy - by PixiXOXO (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I got my laptop back after waiting weeks for it to be fixed. It turns out that they didn't fix it; they dusted it off, held it for a few days, and sent it back. FML

#19985315
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21141) - you deserved it (1619)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my long-term boyfriend insisted on me going down on him. When I asked what he would do in return, he said "I was thinking McDonald's". FML

#19985281
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25371) - you deserved it (4552)

On 07/26/2012 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I came out to my mom as a lesbian. She told me that it was impossible, because since she isn't one, she therefore couldn't have given birth to one. She still won't believe me. FML

#19984576
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26770) - you deserved it (3571)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:04am - misc - by Just Me (woman) - United States (New York)



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