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nihongoso

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nihongoso

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nihongoso's page activity

Visits<b>SerpentBoy</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 5:53pm

nihongoso's FML badges

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nihongoso's favorite FMLs

Today, my parents thought it would be a great surprise to accidentally shoot me in the leg for my birthday. FML

#21152462
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47533) - you deserved it (4552)

On 05/26/2014 at 5:18pm - misc - by Birthday Surprise - United States (Georgia)

Today, I told my girlfriend that I love her. She panicked and blurted out our S&M safeword. FML

#21152151
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46399) - you deserved it (6407)

On 05/26/2014 at 11:53am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my friend announced that she'd lost weight recently. As I was congratulating her, my baby sister said, "I think you're still fat but that's good because you can give more meat to God when you go to heaven." Now I have to explain to a 6-year-old that God isn't a cannibal. FML

#21152005
11 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45885) - you deserved it (5302)

On 05/26/2014 at 7:37am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)

Today, I explained to my dad that I had spent over three hours baking, frosting, and decorating a cake from scratch and how proud I was of it. Without even looking up at me, he replied, "You really need a boyfriend." FML

#21149895
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41820) - you deserved it (4991)

On 05/24/2014 at 2:23am - misc - by lifesabitch2016 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I finally had a date, my first one in well over a year. Everything was going good, until my date asked, "Do you like cats or dogs better?" When I responded cats, my date promptly got up and left, saying, "This isn't meant to be." FML

#21147101
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47728) - you deserved it (11699)

On 05/21/2014 at 7:05am - love - by Alone - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was chewed out by a lady who claimed the laptop she bought wouldn't turn on, and that she wanted a refund. She yelled and shoved the laptop at me, not even listening when I told her I didn't even work at that store. FML

#21143801
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49696) - you deserved it (3887)

On 05/18/2014 at 10:14am - misc - by lemongrab (woman) - Canada

Today, I called the cops on a couple who was fighting outside my window at 4am. They hid in the bushes when the cops came, came back out when they left, and started fighting again. FML

#21142655
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43608) - you deserved it (4370)

On 05/17/2014 at 6:11am - misc - by frustrated - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was taking a piss, when a mosquito came out of nowhere and headed straight for my dick. In my startled attempt to ward it away, I pissed all over everything, including myself. FML

#21142253
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39369) - you deserved it (13504)

On 05/16/2014 at 8:33pm - misc - by pissed off (man) - United States (California)

Today, I started watching porn in my room with the volume muted. A minute later, my dad knocked on the door, so I closed everything and called him in. He just said, "Son, you disgust me." and walked out. Now I'm too paranoid to use my own computer. FML

#21142112
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45710) - you deserved it (12822)

On 05/16/2014 at 6:25pm - intimacy - by wtf (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, one of my year 9 students finished the test an hour early. He decided to spend the time by "stealthily" whacking off. His entire desk was shaking in a silent room. FML

Today, I accidentally said the wrong name during sex. That name just happened to be "Sarah", which is both my ex-girlfriend's name and my wife's sister's name. When she asked me which one I meant, I panicked and said, "Both." FML

#21140956
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32696) - you deserved it (52385)

On 05/15/2014 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by FLIPmcCOOL - Ireland (Cork)

Today, I had to inform a patient that she has an STD. She reacted by kicking me in the nuts. FML

#21140637
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49668) - you deserved it (4447)

On 05/15/2014 at 1:08pm - health - by bruised_scrotum - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I finally brought a girl home from college. While I was making her some coffee, my roommate came down in her underwear, pretended to be my girlfriend, and asked if we were having a threesome. My date left before I could explain, and my roommate thinks it's fucking hilarious. FML

Today, a customer came into our store and asked if we sold "child sized coffins". This isn't even the weirdest question I've been asked. FML

#21140459
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39253) - you deserved it (4214)

On 05/15/2014 at 8:02am - work - by iworkatofficedepothomes (woman) - United States (California)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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