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nihongoso's favorite FMLs
by tylah / 06/23/2012 at 11:11am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, my parents were awake while I was still in bed on my iPod touch. I decided to play The Smurfs Village. One of its minigames involves shaking the iPod, so I was breathing heavily. Later, my parents sat me down for a little "talk". FML
by Anonymous / 06/23/2012 at 9:11am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous
by blah56 / 06/23/2012 at 1:17am / United States (Kentucky) / Love
Today, I entered my first professional fight as a mixed martial artist. It's been my dream to become a UFC champion one day. All I do is train and watch UFC fights all day. I was out cold in a matter of seconds. FML
by yeah / 06/21/2012 at 11:07pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my friend showed off her new tattoo, which is supposed to say "bad bitch" in Italian, and I had to point out that it actually says "defective female". Her response was to cuss me out and inform me that I'm no longer part of her social circle. FML
by tubby / 06/21/2012 at 4:28pm / Sweden (Blekinge Lan) / Miscellaneous
Today, I finally turned 21 so my friends and I decided to go to a club. There, I met this hot waitress and we were really hitting it off. I decided to order a drink. She replied with, "No problem, kiddo." FML
by DerrickUhl / 06/19/2012 at 12:28am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Brittany / 06/18/2012 at 10:57am / United States / Love
Today, I tripped and fell on the sidewalk. As I did, a car that was passing by stopped, made a U-turn, and then came back so the people inside could laugh at me. When they were done taunting me, they made another U-turn and continued back in their original direction. FML
by Anonymous / 06/18/2012 at 10:39am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was having a debate with my friend over tattoos. I used the example that you wouldn't put a bumper sticker on a Ferrari. He looked me in the eye and said, "Yeah, but you're no Ferrari. More like a Prius." FML
by kitty shah / 06/17/2012 at 1:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/17/2012 at 12:53am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I received the photos my friend took of me proposing to my girlfriend. I'd proposed at the place we'd first met: the local zoo. When I looked them over, I noticed there was an elephant taking a poop in the background. FML
by Anonymous / 06/15/2012 at 1:12pm / United States (South Carolina) / Love
by fail / 06/15/2012 at 11:36am / United States (Tennessee) / Love
Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML
by habbsrule / 06/15/2012 at 10:21am / Canada / Kids
by Rose / 06/15/2012 at 1:54am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 06/14/2012 at 10:54am / China (Jiangsu) / Health
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was fired from my job because I, in my bosses words, "Abided by company policy to such an…