nihongoso

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Offline (the 11/14/2016 at 2:47am)

nihongoso

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  • Number of visits : 10630
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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nihongoso's page activity

Visits<b>SerpentBoy</b> - the 02/15/2013 at 5:53pm

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nihongoso's favorite FMLs

Today, being useless at thinking of gifts, I asked my boyfriend what he wants for Christmas. I said it could be anything that I could afford. He looked me in the eye and said very seriously: "Anal." FML

by fuckered519 / 12/06/2014 at 2:53pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my boss for a raise. I pointed out that due to a technicality, if he hired someone to replace me, he'd have to pay them more anyway. He said he'd gladly pay more for "someone who knows his god-damn place" and made it clear I'll be jobless very soon. FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2014 at 1:23pm / United States / Work

Today, while driving home, I swerved to avoid turning a duck and her babies into roadkill. Another car was coming around a sharp bend at the time and swerved to avoid hitting me. In the end, we both ran our cars off the road, and he took out several ducks in the process. FML

by newly passed, newly grassed / 12/06/2014 at 12:04pm / United Kingdom (Birmingham) / Miscellaneous

Today, I thought it would be cute to put on a Santa hat and ask my crush what he wanted for Christmas. He said "A girlfriend." I took off my Santa hat and yelled "Ta-da!" He added, "An ATTRACTIVE girlfriend." FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2014 at 11:28am / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, I came home after doing some Black Friday shopping for Christmas presents. I told my husband I got the must-have toy our daughter has been dying for. As soon as I said it, I heard squealing and turned around to see her standing right behind me. There goes the surprise. FML

by Ruinedchristmas / 11/28/2014 at 1:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, I spent an hour in my car terrified to go inside because I thought my house was being burgled. I saw rapid shadows in the light of my lounge. Eventually I plucked up the courage to creep inside with a rock to find it wasn't a robber. It was my cats, fighting in front of a toppled lamp. FML

by amazinghermit / 11/24/2014 at 11:21pm / United Kingdom (Glasgow City) / Animals

Today, I was in a good mood for once and my professor looks at me and says, "I don't know what you ate for breakfast but you're really annoying today." FML

by anonymous / 11/24/2014 at 10:25pm / United States (Virginia) / Work

Today, I finally noticed how lonely I am when I realized I was petting my couch while reading a book. FML

by Hammy / 11/24/2014 at 9:17pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I realized that customers at my work ask me "Are you new or just stupid?" just as often as they did when I first started. FML

by stupid / 11/24/2014 at 2:21pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Work

Today, I decided to check out a dating site, when I stumbled across my ex wife's profile. She'd had it for four out of the five years of our marriage. And no, it didn't rate us as a good match. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2014 at 1:47pm / United States (Virginia) / Love

Today, I held the door open for an old lady, before realizing she was a teacher taking 20-plus kids to lunch at local burger joint, all of whom got in front of me in the line to order. FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2014 at 12:46pm / United States / Kids

Today, I have to deal with being laughed at by my mother and sister, because they keep making sharp movements towards me, causing me to flinch. This is because I got mugged and beaten last night. They think it's hysterical. FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2014 at 12:10pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I started to get horny while watching TV with my husband. I tried turning him on by telling him I wanted his cock. He cheerfully replied without looking away from the TV, "If only I gave a fuck, babe, if only I gave a fuck!" FML

by 404: fuck not given / 11/23/2014 at 11:34am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, in thanks for my assistance, a customer recommended me a plastic surgeon who could "really help with that face." FML

by Anonymous / 11/23/2014 at 5:27am / Australia (Victoria) / Work

Today, I accidentally called my boss 'mom'. Now she is jokingly telling everyone that I'm the long-lost daughter she gave up for adoption, because she knew I'd be a failure. FML

by naladetet / 11/23/2014 at 3:31am / United States (New Jersey) / Work