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nihongoso's FML badges
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nihongoso's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 12/13/2015 at 7:45am / Transportation
Today, I confessed to my coworker that I'm interested in her romantically. She turned me down, saying that I'm a great guy, but that she basically doesn't want mixed-race children. She said she isn't racist, though, so I guess it's all okay, right? FML
by disgusted / 12/13/2015 at 2:45am / United States (Utah) / Love
by sudoku_fiend / 12/12/2015 at 11:40pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
Today, a close friend told me she had no plans for her birthday. I found out she was lying when I had to serve her and 9 other mutual friends dinner at the restaurant I work at. I don't know what's worse, the fact that I wasn't invited or that none of them even remembered that I worked there. FML
by not invited / 12/12/2015 at 8:13pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous
Today, my step mom sat me down and told me that she doesn't think that my dad is my biological father because she hasn't gotten pregnant from him. I don't think she quite understands the concept of being a step mom. FML
by anonymous / 12/12/2015 at 3:58pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Knaxer / 12/12/2015 at 12:22pm / United States (Maryland) / Transportation
Today, I woke up to the feeling of something crawling up my leg. I threw back the bed sheets and saw it was a cockroach. My dad said my ensuing scream was so girlish that he wondered what the hell my sister was doing in my bedroom. FML
by shat / 12/12/2015 at 2:14am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, the small plane I was on almost crashed, all because the pilot's girlfriend figured out mid-flight that he's been cheating on her, causing her to start screaming abuse and furiously beating him. FML
by Anonymous / 12/12/2015 at 12:32am / United States (New York) / Transportation
Today, I had my first job interview in months. The guy chuckled mockingly at my master's degree in philosophy and wound up admitting that he had no idea why I'd even been selected to be interviewed. FML
by Anonymous / 12/11/2015 at 2:16pm / United States (Iowa) / Work
Today, I had been stress-eating a lot of junk food during finals week at college. I was feeling worried about my figure, and lifted up my shirt to see myself in the mirror. My boyfriend, who I didn't know was watching, promptly said, "Whoa babe, it looks like the condom broke!" FML
by pregnantapparently / 12/10/2015 at 1:45pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love
by AlwaysRejected / 12/10/2015 at 10:53am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by fucking SUCKS let's do it LIIIIIIIVEEEEEEEEE! / 12/10/2015 at 8:45am / United States / Health
Today, I fell asleep while using my laptop. The next thing I know, it's 8am and my dad is screaming at me for posting "u skank-ass cunt-face" on my mom's Facebook timeline. I never made that post, but he won't believe me. My asshole brother, meanwhile, can't stop smirking at me. FML
by Anonymous / 12/10/2015 at 8:27am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/10/2015 at 3:19am / Sri Lanka (Western) / Love
Today, I've become so accustomed to finding my sister drunk or otherwise passed out in the same spot in the living room that every time I go in there, I instinctively lift my feet higher as though to step over her, even when she's not there. FML
by anonymous / 12/09/2015 at 9:59pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous