About nightbirdblue : I had some great statement to say about FML earlier, but i forgot it.
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nightbirdblue's favorite FMLs
Today, I was talking to my friend in Spanish because he understands it better than English. We were in the middle of a discussion about a TV show when some guy from our school ran up, spat on my shoes and screamed, "I SPEAK SPANISH, STOP TALKING ABOUT ME!" and ran away. FML
by marigoldcobain / 02/04/2015 at 6:11pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by FrustratedTutor / 02/03/2015 at 10:39pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I saw my co-worker write about how awful Muslims were and how the religion is stupid, the hijab is oppressive, and how they're a poison on society. When I questioned them about it, they pretty much said that I didn't know anything and should stop talking. I'm Muslim and a hijabi. FML
by coveredupforfun / 02/03/2015 at 10:13pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by Anonymous / 02/03/2015 at 1:23pm / United States (Wyoming) / Love
by dogbreederssuck / 02/03/2015 at 10:26am / United Kingdom (Lancashire) / Animals
by bruhandbutercup / 02/02/2015 at 7:08pm / United States (Maryland) / Work
by itsemilyc / 02/02/2015 at 2:34pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy
by okseñoryoucrazy / 02/01/2015 at 7:43pm / United States (Washington) / Health
by FuckfaceSteve / 02/01/2015 at 9:59am / United Kingdom (Durham) / Love
by Anonymous / 02/01/2015 at 5:21am / United States / Work
by WalkTheOtherWay / 01/31/2015 at 9:29pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got married. My grandpa took me aside afterwards and said that the moment the ceremony was over, he heard my wife's vagina slam shut. "Welcome to marriage, sucker," he chuckled, "It's just you and Rosy Palm now!" FML
by Anonymous / 01/31/2015 at 12:38am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, after telling my husband he can send me dirty texts any time, he sent me one from work. It said, "Babe when I get home, I'm gonna go 9/11 on your pussy ;)". I'm still not sure he understands why that was so offensive. FML
by The Soul Of A Damned Queef / 01/30/2015 at 11:04pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, when making a delivery for the restaurant I work for, a customer shoved and yelled at me because she didn't get any fries with her order. She didn't order any, which isn't unusual, considering we're a Chinese takeaway and don't even sell them. FML
by Anonymous / 01/30/2015 at 8:25pm / Australia (Queensland) / Work
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I moved three hours away from my boyfriend for college. Even though he got accepted to the…