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nightbirdblue

Offline (the 03/09/2015 at 11:11pm) | Search for a member

nightbirdblue

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 12 May 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 11125
  • Number of comments : 317
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 34 posted

About nightbirdblue : I had some great statement to say about FML earlier, but i forgot it.

nightbirdblue's page activity

Visits<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 5:49pm<b>kukumber</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 3:45pm<b>madi113</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 11:19am<b>Fou_Lou</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 6:40am<b>Railworker12</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 7:42am<b>iG_08</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 5:26am<b>dekomori</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 4:21am<b>AWildNoeAppeared</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 12:54pm<b>ksks1234</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 2:51am<b>Raptor73242</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 9:01am<b>z3r0d4z3</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 11:27pm<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 5:12am<b>icnburbbygrl</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 2:41am<b>Ikashy73</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 11:11pm<b>sonshadsil94</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 10:47am<b>possesedbanans</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 9:00am<b>Wolfparable</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 6:32am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:21pm

Fucked!<b>cdncw</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 11:49pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 12:43am<b>TheBadAndGnarly</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 8:08pm

nightbirdblue's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of nightbirdblue's badges

nightbirdblue's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that my 4-year-old son is truly convinced that I am a ghost. He also thinks that I died from burning, "because of your face". FML

#21349104
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27751) - you deserved it (1872)

On 02/03/2015 at 3:45pm - kids - by burned -

Today, I was making out with a girl I've liked for a long time. At one point she stopped kissing me and said, "You kiss like my brother". I sat there dumbstruck as she went back to kissing me. FML

#21349028
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34487) - you deserved it (2336)

On 02/03/2015 at 1:23pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Wyoming)

Today, at work, I had to tell a woman that there is no such thing as a "pedigree Beahuahuadoodle", and that she'd essentially paid $500 for a mutt. FML

#21348955
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28042) - you deserved it (2340)

On 02/03/2015 at 10:26am - animals - by dogbreederssuck (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, my boss informed me I couldn't go on my "vacation" because he's leaving for one of his employees' weddings. That just so happens to be my wedding, for which I'm taking the vacation. FML

Today, my boyfriend "accidentally" had sex with my roommate. FML

#21348376
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44817) - you deserved it (3224)

On 02/02/2015 at 2:34pm - intimacy - by itsemilyc - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out that my 2-year-old brother is afraid of his own penis. Whenever he doesn't have a diaper on, he screams, cries and yells, "Ew". FML

#21347945
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30084) - you deserved it (2458)

On 02/01/2015 at 7:43pm - health - by okseñoryoucrazy - United States (Washington)

Today, the girl I like finally replied to a text I sent a week ago. Her reply was: "Don't ever text me again, fuckface." FML

#21347694
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31204) - you deserved it (4008)

On 02/01/2015 at 9:59am - love - by FuckfaceSteve (man) - United Kingdom (Durham)

Today, my boss explained that the company will be letting me go. She got so upset that she couldn't leave her office and I had to console her. I had to make her feel less sad for laying me off. FML

#21347642
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29209) - you deserved it (2449)

On 02/01/2015 at 5:21am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was in a heated debate about climate change. I got so flustered that I forgot the word "volcano" and ended up calling them "exploding mountain things". End of the debate. Shame. FML

#21347486
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27089) - you deserved it (6555)

On 01/31/2015 at 9:29pm - misc - by WalkTheOtherWay - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got married. My grandpa took me aside afterwards and said that the moment the ceremony was over, he heard my wife's vagina slam shut. "Welcome to marriage, sucker," he chuckled, "It's just you and Rosy Palm now!" FML

#21347104
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27742) - you deserved it (2894)

On 01/31/2015 at 12:38am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, after telling my husband he can send me dirty texts any time, he sent me one from work. It said, "Babe when I get home, I'm gonna go 9/11 on your pussy ;)". I'm still not sure he understands why that was so offensive. FML

#21347069
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26847) - you deserved it (5130)

On 01/30/2015 at 11:04pm - intimacy - by The Soul Of A Damned Queef (woman) - United States (California)

Today, when making a delivery for the restaurant I work for, a customer shoved and yelled at me because she didn't get any fries with her order. She didn't order any, which isn't unusual, considering we're a Chinese takeaway and don't even sell them. FML

#21347009
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27922) - you deserved it (1754)

On 01/30/2015 at 8:25pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I showed my son the old trick of turning a calculator upside down and spelling "BOOBIES" on it in numbers. He laughed, then spent nearly 20 minutes trying to spell "COCKS", before giving up and hurling the calculator across the room. I wish my sperm had a warranty. FML

#21346989
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24244) - you deserved it (6180)

On 01/30/2015 at 7:51pm - kids - by 3722145 (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I asked my friend to download Frozen for me, because my mom wanted to play it for family movie night. The movie was shit, but it got even worse halfway through, when it cut to hardcore porn and a text bar saying "umad?" Now I'm grounded, and my "friend" is a legend for his prank. FML

#21346882
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30008) - you deserved it (5208)

On 01/30/2015 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex. In the middle of it he said, "I want us to be covalent bonds". I didn't understand what he meant, and he actually stopped to explain it to me. FML

#21346746
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25843) - you deserved it (6876)

On 01/30/2015 at 10:11am - intimacy - by Chemist-why (woman) - United States (California)



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