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nightbirdblue

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nightbirdblue

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 12 May 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7340
  • Number of comments : 309
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 34 posted

About nightbirdblue : Kitten ears?

nightbirdblue's page activity

Visits<b>triplebeerox</b> - 17 hours ago<b>icnburbbygrl</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 2:41am<b>Ikashy73</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 11:11pm<b>sonshadsil94</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 10:47am<b>possesedbanans</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 9:00am<b>Wolfparable</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 6:32am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:21pm<b>Viscouz</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 9:12am<b>expertsmilee</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 3:40am<b>tbro47</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 9:23pm<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 8:17pm<b>plan_Z</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 7:54pm<b>kaet</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 1:02pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 9:58pm<b>Sara95</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 9:39pm<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 6:43pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 6:39pm<b>yoursmileishawt</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 12:42am

Liked!<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 12:43am<b>TheBadAndGnarly</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 8:08pm

nightbirdblue's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of nightbirdblue's badges

nightbirdblue's favorite FMLs

Today, I called a suicide prevention hotline. The guy who picked up sounded drunk, told me to fuck off, and hung up. FML

#21342247
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37285) - you deserved it (3147)

On 01/22/2015 at 12:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a homeless guy tried to light my hair on fire with a match at the bus stop. FML

#21342118
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28239) - you deserved it (2196)

On 01/22/2015 at 5:40am - misc - by burningman (man) - Germany (Hessen)

Today, I caught my girlfriend Googling how to uninstall Siri. I asked why she wanted to do that, and she said, "I don't like it. I don't like how the slut talks to you." I get the feeling I'll need a gun when I break up with this crazy fucker. FML

#21342067
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32013) - you deserved it (4606)

On 01/22/2015 at 1:41am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I babysat an 11 year old kid while his parents ate out. As soon as they left, the kid asked me if I wanted to be on the sex offender's list. Before I could even process that, he told me to stay out of his way and he wouldn't accuse me of anything. FML

#21341483
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34455) - you deserved it (2154)

On 01/21/2015 at 6:57am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out the pet name my girlfriend gave my penis wasn't randomly made up after all; it's her ex's name. FML

#21341448
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30555) - you deserved it (2601)

On 01/21/2015 at 3:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I did my first night of open-mic standup. The first 5 minutes went badly, but I don't know if it got any better afterwards, because a drunk audience member climbed up on stage and knocked me out. FML

#21341383
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28114) - you deserved it (3377)

On 01/21/2015 at 12:34am - work - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, while trying to take a crap, I shut the bathroom door. A minute later, my 3 year old daughter knocked and said "Mommy, do you wanna build a snowman?" She kept singing the song until I was finally done. FML

#21341221
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29388) - you deserved it (4203)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:05pm - kids - by frozenpoo - United States

Today, I texted my boyfriend a few dirty messages at lunch time and told him how badly I wanted him home. He texted back lecturing me on how I shouldn't be so drunk so early. I was totally sober, but now I need a drink. FML

#21340989
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30246) - you deserved it (4496)

On 01/20/2015 at 2:54pm - intimacy - by fun in functioning, I suppose - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I found out my boyfriend dresses in my underwear and tights, takes suggestive shots of his ass and legs, and uses them to trick people into thinking he's a girl so they buy him stuff in his online games. FML

#21340885
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31934) - you deserved it (3379)

On 01/20/2015 at 10:08am - misc - by mybfthecrossdresser (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was playing Charades. My boyfriend, who I'd recently had a fight with, had trouble and just said his answer was the name of my celebrity twin. Nobody got it. He said "Really? It's Fat Bastard." Stunned silence followed, broken by a single "HAH." from my 'best friend'. FML

#21340816
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28689) - you deserved it (3359)

On 01/20/2015 at 6:04am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, while trying some new kinky things with my boyfriend, he cried out, "Call me Jesus!" Yeah... I think we're done with that. FML

#21340673
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27715) - you deserved it (3457)

On 01/19/2015 at 11:42pm - intimacy - by BDSM4Jesus - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while on my driving test, the guy told me to pull over and do a U-turn. A few minutes later, he asked me to do another one. After the test, he said I'd failed because the second U-turn was illegal, and I should have refused to comply. I didn't know they're even allowed do that. FML

#21340454
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35058) - you deserved it (4710)

On 01/19/2015 at 6:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I met my boyfriend's best friend. She was a girl he's known for years, and I respected that. She was sweet, until my boyfriend went to the bathroom and she threatened to stab me if I don't leave him. He doesn't believe me, and accused me of having serious jealousy issues. FML

#21340122
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35770) - you deserved it (2361)

On 01/19/2015 at 8:35am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, my crush was giving me a ride home. As we pulled up to my house, he looked into my eyes with a sweet smile and said the words every girl wants to hear - "Do you give head?" FML

#21339980
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33640) - you deserved it (5210)

On 01/19/2015 at 12:35am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, a customer tried to order a Zinger burger. I tried to explain that he was at McDonalds and that the Zinger is a KFC burger. He accused me of lying to him and tried to report me to my manager. FML

#21339341
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28596) - you deserved it (1969)

On 01/18/2015 at 2:04am - work - by McSlave - Australia (New South Wales)



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  • Yes, we're late. We've been doing stuff, the New Year and our birthday party got in the way, but there's no excuse. So, we're sorry for not churning out another Best of the Worst in due…

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