Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

nightbirdblue

Online | Search for a member

nightbirdblue

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 12 May 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4530
  • Number of comments : 285
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 26 posted

About nightbirdblue : Kitten ears?

nightbirdblue's page activity

Visits<b>flufee2</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 10:21pm<b>Mornai</b> - the 09/19/2014 at 10:26am<b>DArthurVaderian</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 6:11pm<b>Starzak</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 3:54pm<b>QD</b> - the 08/30/2014 at 4:44am<b>isuckwithnames</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 12:26pm<b>fvt</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 6:41am<b>Crofty92</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 2:56am<b>VeganVampyre</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 8:25am<b>Will21</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 4:02pm<b>starsierra</b> - the 08/06/2014 at 10:57am<b>kayse</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 7:08pm<b>fu7127</b> - the 07/05/2014 at 10:59am<b>adrianvons</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 4:04am<b>weirdangelz2</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 3:29pm<b>lexa1love</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 2:17pm<b>Gestpacho88</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 1:22am<b>EchoSerenity</b> - the 06/18/2014 at 2:05pm

nightbirdblue's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

See all of nightbirdblue's badges

nightbirdblue's favorite FMLs

Today, my boss changed some company calendar settings on my computer to see what they'd be like. He didn't like it, so he told me to change it back, then left. I have no idea what he changed. FML

#21263813
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10718) - you deserved it (846)

On 09/23/2014 at 1:29pm - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, a new fire alarm system is being installed in my building. Not only does the alarm go off incessantly, but the elevators stop running when it happens. I live on the 12th floor. FML

#21263239
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17986) - you deserved it (1402)

On 09/22/2014 at 5:15pm - misc - by paedra - United States (New York)

Today, a new fire alarm system is being installed in my building. Not only does the alarm go off incessantly, but the elevators stop running when it happens. I live on the 12th floor. FML

#21263239
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17986) - you deserved it (1402)

On 09/22/2014 at 5:15pm - misc - by paedra - United States (New York)

Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML

#21262317
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30511) - you deserved it (4506)

On 09/21/2014 at 7:27am - intimacy - by Sinnersinner - United States (California)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30553) - you deserved it (7617)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to stop at a gas station to go to the bathroom. A sign on the door told people to knock since the door didn't lock. As I was peeing, a lady walked in on me. Rather than simply saying sorry and shutting the damn door, she opened it wider and stepped in to apologize. FML

#21262000
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29703) - you deserved it (2145)

On 09/20/2014 at 7:39pm - misc - by rabid_otaku - United States (Illinois)

Today, I asked my dad to take me to the store so I could get some feminine hygiene products. When we got there, he went running down the aisles yelling, "Help! My daughter's bleeding to death! Where're the tampons?!" FML

#21261392
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34991) - you deserved it (3237)

On 09/19/2014 at 6:38pm - health - by tbree - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend broke things off, because he says I have a "horrible, horrible personality" and that I'm only really fuck-buddy material, which is a problem because he wants something long-term. We've been dating for three years. FML

#21261219
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30084) - you deserved it (2969)

On 09/19/2014 at 12:06pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Belgium (West-Vlaanderen)

Today, I went with a couple of my friends to see a friend who's fallen very ill. Her dad walked in with a gun and demanded to know which of us had gotten his daughter pregnant. By the time I realized it was a joke, I'd already pissed myself. FML

#21261205
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31721) - you deserved it (4169)

On 09/19/2014 at 11:30am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I went on a blind date. My date would respond to me by saying "retweet" and "favorite" when she thought something was relatable. FML

#21261017
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36734) - you deserved it (3174)

On 09/18/2014 at 11:15pm - love - by clairebear104 - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I had a volleyball game, and we were down by 13 points. I looked up at the crowd, and my mom was shaking her head in disappointment. When it was my turn to serve, I aced them, and tied the score. When I looked up she was gone. She'd left. When I got home, I heard how I sucked for an hour. FML

#21260940
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36542) - you deserved it (2277)

On 09/18/2014 at 9:56pm - misc - by Lexi801 - United States (Utah)

Today, I got an Economics test back from my professor. I got a 17/20. I looked it over and noticed one of the questions was completely right. I checked the textbook he made and the answer was the same. I asked him why it was wrong, and he responded with, "I guess I changed my mind." FML

#21260926
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33690) - you deserved it (2102)

On 09/18/2014 at 9:44pm - misc - by badprofessor - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend admitted that she "probably wasn't even sober" when I asked her out and she said yes. Our almost 2-year relationship is the longest drunken mistake ever. FML

#21260142
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30910) - you deserved it (2729)

On 09/17/2014 at 5:22pm - love - by KayEffEh (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got dumped by my boyfriend. He said it was because he lived 2 hours away, but I think the ultrasound photos his other girlfriend posted proudly on his Facebook wall are the real reason. FML

#21260092
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39697) - you deserved it (3673)

On 09/17/2014 at 3:48pm - love - by kitkat (woman) - United States

Today, I got up at 4.30am, like I do every morning, and got ready for work. Just as I was about to walk out the door, my flatmate jumped me and beat the snot out of me thinking I was a burglar. Because apparently burglars shower, make toast and clean up before stealing all your shit. FML

#21259933
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37611) - you deserved it (2494)

On 09/17/2014 at 8:18am - misc - by makeyourselfathome (man) - Australia (Victoria)



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you have any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: