Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

nightbirdblue

Offline (the 03/09/2015 at 11:11pm) | Search for a member

nightbirdblue

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 12 May 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 9167
  • Number of comments : 317
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 34 posted

About nightbirdblue : I had some great statement to say about FML earlier, but i forgot it.

nightbirdblue's page activity

Visits<b>madi113</b> - one hour ago<b>Fou_Lou</b> - the 03/05/2015 at 6:40am<b>Railworker12</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 7:42am<b>iG_08</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 5:26am<b>dekomori</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 4:21am<b>AWildNoeAppeared</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 12:54pm<b>ksks1234</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 2:51am<b>Raptor73242</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 9:01am<b>z3r0d4z3</b> - the 02/08/2015 at 11:27pm<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 01/29/2015 at 5:12am<b>icnburbbygrl</b> - the 01/19/2015 at 2:41am<b>Ikashy73</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 11:11pm<b>sonshadsil94</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 10:47am<b>possesedbanans</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 9:00am<b>Wolfparable</b> - the 01/12/2015 at 6:32am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 1:21pm<b>Viscouz</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 9:12am<b>expertsmilee</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 3:40am

Liked!<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 12:43am<b>TheBadAndGnarly</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 8:08pm

nightbirdblue's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of nightbirdblue's badges

nightbirdblue's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my Dad I was an alcoholic and had decided to seek help. His reply, "Don't stop drinking, you are the life of the party, funny and beautiful when you drink." FML

#21371044
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31689) - you deserved it (3032)

On 03/09/2015 at 8:15am - health - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I woke up this morning in a panic. Last night, I heard scratching at my door, but I thought it was just my cat and went back to sleep. This morning, it hit me that my cat is 600 miles away living with my mom in Iowa. I'm terrified to even sleep now. FML

#21370427
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31803) - you deserved it (2534)

On 03/08/2015 at 10:41am - animals - by no salt, no burning, just STFU (man) - United States

Today, my little sister complained about a young boy in her class always pulling her hair. She asked when boys will stop doing it. My mom replied, "They won't, even when they're grown-ups," then looked over at my dad and shared a dirty smirk. FML

#21369959
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34533) - you deserved it (3207)

On 03/07/2015 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by greatly disturbed - United States (California)

Today, at a big family dinner, my dad said, "Pfff, gays don't have it hard at all. The things a guy has to do for sex with a girl? Crazy. All a gay guy has to do for sex is become an altar boy!" My husband's side of the family is very religious, and all hell quickly broke loose. FML

#21369938
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32514) - you deserved it (3025)

On 03/07/2015 at 1:42pm - misc - by killme (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my son was at a birthday party. After eating a plate of cake, he loudly asked the birthday boy's mum if he could have sloppy seconds. I don't know where he heard that phrase, but the other kids' parents shot me very dirty looks. FML

#21369892
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27093) - you deserved it (2712)

On 03/07/2015 at 11:59am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I got a haircut. The guy quickly cut off most of the hair above my forehead. When I angrily asked him what he was doing, he said, "Quitting." FML

#21369589
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34714) - you deserved it (2010)

On 03/06/2015 at 10:22pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to sit and smile as a drunk lady ranted about how body hair on a woman is disgusting and unfeminine, then in the next breath say that only pedos like women who shave their vaginas. That's the last time I ever have dinner with my boyfriend's parents. FML

#21369265
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28137) - you deserved it (1921)

On 03/06/2015 at 11:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mother walked in on me watching porn. As punishment, she sat down and made me watch the rest of it with her as she gave play-by-play commentary. FML

#21368964
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42819) - you deserved it (19300)

On 03/05/2015 at 10:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, as I was riding my bike home from school, I saw a homeless man sitting on a bench. I was about to walk up to him and give him money, but before I could do anything my mother walked up and kissed him. My mom is dating this guy. FML

#21368890
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34930) - you deserved it (2773)

On 03/05/2015 at 8:38pm - love - by Not Homeless - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend convinced a girl at the club to break up with her boyfriend and go home with him. She did. Now I'm single too. FML

#21368542
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34896) - you deserved it (2831)

On 03/05/2015 at 8:32am - love - by therealkathl - Austria

Today, my neighbor at my apartment building told me water from my sink was leaking into his apartment. He told me to call maintenance to fix it, but they won't help unless he calls. He refuses to, and I can't do my dishes without feeling like an asshole. FML

#21368266
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28814) - you deserved it (2516)

On 03/04/2015 at 9:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML

#21367918
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23379) - you deserved it (33006)

On 03/04/2015 at 10:03am - health - by actually just constipated.. and stupid - Tunisia

Today, I got a call from a potential employer. They spent five minutes explaining job duties and I listened with anticipation. Then they spent five minutes explaining why I wasn't the right person for the job. FML

#21367505
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27761) - you deserved it (1934)

On 03/03/2015 at 7:28pm - work - by Kali (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after several sleepless nights full of crying, I went to my university's free help center. After telling the psychologist my problems and asking what to do, he looked at me blankly and said, "Uh, it's not depression, I guess. You should go out more and, like, party some more." FML

#21367402
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29897) - you deserved it (2733)

On 03/03/2015 at 5:02pm - health - by Anonymous - Germany (Baden-Wurttemberg)

Today, I got fired from my new waitress job after 2 shifts. They said I wasn't experienced enough to handle the fast pace. I thought I'd been doing well so I asked my friend who works there what really happened. Apparently not showing my boobs enough at a family place was grounds for dismissal. FML

#21367306
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28392) - you deserved it (1989)

On 03/03/2015 at 2:06pm - work - by miewann - United States (North Carolina)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: