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nightDREAMERms

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nightDREAMERms
  • Town/Country : somewhere-with-icecream, united states
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1038
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About nightDREAMERms : um... i'll fill this out later

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nightDREAMERms's favorite FMLs

Today, I told my friend how I liked this girl but was too scared to ask her out. He told me "Why? The worst she's going to do is say no." Building confidence I approached her and asked her on a date. Then she replied "Get away douchebag!" and kicked me in the nuts. FML

#4423387
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53363) - you deserved it (4236)

On 08/10/2009 at 5:20am - love - by Rejected (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had a girl come over to my house that I had been texting for four days. I asked her what she wanted to do and she replied "take a nap". Becoming really excited I lead her to my bedroom and went to the hiding spot for my condoms, she was serious about the nap. FML

#4404906
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9820) - you deserved it (55886)

On 08/09/2009 at 8:43am - love - by hugedissapointment (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was playing songs at a funeral in my church. As the organ wasn't in tune I had to use an electronic piano instead. All was going well until in the end of a speech, I accidentally hit the 'demo' button. None of the grieving relatives were impressed by my drum beats and turntable scratches. FML

#4344107
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35521) - you deserved it (6309)

On 08/06/2009 at 8:22pm - work - by Jacky-Boy (man) - United Kingdom (Liverpool)

Today, a very good friend of mine said he had a question to ask me. Jokingly, I threw my arms around his neck and said, "Oh yes, yes, a thousand times yes!" When I sat back down, I saw tears in his eyes, and he said, "You've made me the happiest man alive" as he pulled a small box out of his coat. FML

#4340185
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24880) - you deserved it (93509)

On 08/06/2009 at 5:25pm - love - by dundundadumb (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was working the lighting for a drama production. In the last scene, two characters realize they are in love and kiss, then the stage goes dark. I mixed up my settings, and instead of a blackout, flashing party lights started going off. 300 people turn around to stare at me. FML

#4285773
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13787) - you deserved it (32446)

On 08/04/2009 at 4:22pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my grandfather was counting all the grandchildren he had and saying how fortunate he was to have all of us. When I pointed out that he'd forgotten to count me, he turned and said "You're adopted, you don't count as a real grandchild" FML

#4277712
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80100) - you deserved it (3639)

On 08/04/2009 at 8:02am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, my boyfriend was reading me a love poem he wrote for me. It was beautiful, and going really well until he read the last line, which had a girl's name in it. It wasn't my name. My boyfriend said "shit, wrong girl", and dug through his bag for a different poem. FML

#4277493
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56286) - you deserved it (4022)

On 08/04/2009 at 7:27am - love - by jemma (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was getting mugged. In shock, I said, "Are you mugging me?!" To which the mugger responded, "Duh, do you think I grabbed you for your looks?" FML

#4274462
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46441) - you deserved it (6753)

On 08/04/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I found out that I was held back in preschool because of some developmental issues. My parents didn't think it was important enough to mention it to me. Why hadn't I figured it out? They also lied to me about how old I was. FML

#4247689
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63467) - you deserved it (3639)

On 08/03/2009 at 2:31am - misc - by dumb (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I finally decided to tell my mother, a former Miss North Carolina winner, that I was several weeks pregnant. She immediately burst into tears and hugged me. She kept saying, "Thank god, thank god." At first I was relieved. Then she said, "I thought you were just getting fat." FML

#4244213
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44637) - you deserved it (4071)

On 08/03/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, as my son carried the cage with live food for his pet lizards up the stairs, I heard the sound of 2,500 baby crickets escaping. FML

#4239314
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40553) - you deserved it (4621)

On 08/02/2009 at 9:29pm - animals - by cricketeer (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my brother's best friend spent the night and was changing with the door partially open. He's super hot and as I was watching him change, he sneezed. Forgetting he didn't know I was watching him, I said bless you. He called me a freak, slammed the door in my face and told my parents. FML

#4235040
415 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12168) - you deserved it (111855)

On 08/02/2009 at 6:03pm - misc - by jeeperspeepers (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was with my mom and my boyfriend at lunch. My phone rings and my mom excitedly says "You have friends!" As I'm about to answer it, she pulls out her phone from under the table and says "Kidding, it's just me." My boyfriend starts cracking up, and they exchange a high five. FML

#4229570
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55713) - you deserved it (5480)

On 08/02/2009 at 1:12pm - misc - by NoFriends - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, a friend offered to have sex with me, since I'm a 19 year old virgin who's only been kissed. He then added on that I would have to give him my Wii in return. FML

#4159325
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43043) - you deserved it (6009)

On 07/30/2009 at 11:52am - intimacy - by VelocityMary (woman) - United States - moderated by the Jackass crew



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