About nicolemarkovic : Graphic design student, book lover, forever alone cat owner, cooking enthusiast, classical music fan, whiskey and beer drinking cigarettes smoking persona.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
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Today, my daughter told me that she wanted to convert to a Christian. Not because she has a strong relation with God, but because she wants to post Facebook statuses about Him and "get a lot of likes." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17789) - you deserved it (2032)
On 10/24/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I learned that despite having told them two years ago, my parents still aren't accepting of me being gay. I found this out when my mom called and asked if I was "cured" yet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18994) - you deserved it (3410)
On 10/24/2012 at 6:43pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Hawaii)
Today, my boyfriend went to ask my dad for my hand in marriage. All I could make out from the door was mumbling, until profanities started flying. My boyfriend shouted "well she's a SINGLE bitch now!" and stormed out of the house. My dad still refuses to tell me what happened in there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24408) - you deserved it (1323)
On 10/24/2012 at 5:08pm - love - by wtactualfuck :( (woman) - United States
Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend from 5 years back. Still bitter, I said, "Hey baby, you remember riding me 5 years ago?" I was then punched in the face and restrained until the police arrived. She'd been having an 8 year anniversary dinner with her husband. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12827) - you deserved it (32098)
On 10/24/2012 at 2:26pm - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, there was a horrible smell in my kitchen. I tried to find the source, but failed and had to leave for the day. That night, my brother informed me that the smell was coming from a dead mouse stuck in our toaster. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15222) - you deserved it (1145)
On 10/24/2012 at 1:35pm - animals - by 12693 - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, I passed out while I was with my boyfriend in his garden. I woke up on the concrete just outside his house. Apparently, he'd tried to carry me in, but because he was too weak, he gave up and went to watch TV. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16982) - you deserved it (2071)
On 10/24/2012 at 12:52pm - love - by Alice - United Kingdom
Today, I came home to find an almost completely devoured cheesecake, The Notebook playing on the TV, and a shoe thrown at my head. It's safe to say my girlfriend is just about on her period. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20931) - you deserved it (4129)
On 10/22/2012 at 3:08pm - misc - by jesushelpme (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22260) - you deserved it (3161)
On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my girlfriend tried to wake me with a handjob. Because I'm a very light sleeper, I woke straight away and instinctively punched whoever was touching my dick. She forgave me, but I don't think her father ever will once he finds out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13791) - you deserved it (3193)
On 10/20/2012 at 1:29pm - love - by nahalDZ - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Today, my husband and I decided to tell our sixteen-year-old daughter that she's adopted. Her response was, "Thank God!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (19139) - you deserved it (4387)
On 10/19/2012 at 3:59am - kids - by best_mom_ever (woman) - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I tried role playing with my boyfriend. As I came out in sexy lingerie, I announced, "I'm Natalia, a Russian spy fluent in 2 languages: Russian and your cock." He laughed so hard he practically pissed himself. The night ended in me doing his laundry. Alone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21217) - you deserved it (11997)
On 10/16/2012 at 8:36am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, my parents gave me a sock and card for my eighteenth birthday. The card said, "Now that Dobby is free, get out." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21041) - you deserved it (2393)
On 10/15/2012 at 9:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)
Today, my boyfriend promised me he wouldn't leave me alone in Niagara. I'm currently sitting alone in the hotel room drinking a bottle of wine while he gambles away money he doesn't have. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14543) - you deserved it (2189)
On 10/14/2012 at 8:43am - love - by lonelygirl - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to initiate sex with me in my sleep. He confessed to thinking that if he did it lightly enough, I'd think I was just dreaming. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17935) - you deserved it (2508)
On 10/14/2012 at 12:24am - intimacy - by Light Sleeper - United States (Indiana)
Today, while my husband and I are both stuck in the bathroom from food poisoning, our 3-year-old son is taking advantage of his freedom. All I can hear is banging noises and wild laughter. I'm afraid to leave the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15553) - you deserved it (1527)
On 10/13/2012 at 7:37am - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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