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nicolemarkovic

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nicolemarkovic
  • Town/Country : Liptovský Mikuláš, Slovakia
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 1 May 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 8559
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About nicolemarkovic : Graphic design student, horse riding instructor, book lover, forever alone cat owner, cooking enthusiast, classical music fan, whiskey and beer drinking cigarettes smoking persona.

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nicolemarkovic's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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nicolemarkovic's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to the store to buy some new shirts. I tried them on and none of them fit. When I walked out to return the shirts, everybody was staring at me. I looked down to see why. I'd forgotten to put my original shirt back on. FML

#19991846
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7658) - you deserved it (19072)

On 07/30/2012 at 12:40am - misc - by hoaloha - United States (Arizona)

Today, I began to daydream about going on a diet and losing some weight. As I did so, I unknowingly reached for a giant bag of chips and ate the whole thing. Now, I have stopped daydreaming and am sitting alone and depressed. And I'm all out of chips. FML

#19990099
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8561) - you deserved it (22477)

On 07/29/2012 at 1:12am - misc - by daydreamer (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9356) - you deserved it (32988)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, my boyfriend and I broke up after three years. I came home and when my dad asked what was wrong, I told him. His first reaction was, "Well damn it. Who'll go fishing with me now?" FML

#19948729
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22030) - you deserved it (2233)

On 07/17/2012 at 3:19am - love - by lovealways22 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my girlfriend got a tattoo of a Rainbow Dash over her pubic mound. Now whenever I go down on her, I'll be eye-to-eye with an adorable pony that shits rainbows. FML

#19881608
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25493) - you deserved it (4239)

On 07/02/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by nobrony (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML

#19861407
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5669) - you deserved it (76936)

On 06/28/2012 at 4:29pm - kids - by MeanMother - United States (Missouri)

Today, I confronted my daughter about the various drug-associated items I found in her room. She then confronted me about going in her room and invading her privacy, to the point where I forgot the main issue and apologised to her. I just got outsmarted by a teenage pothead. FML

#19857408
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7491) - you deserved it (26296)

On 06/27/2012 at 7:28pm - kids - by apparantlyStupid - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my grandmother said she's noticed that I've been very angry lately. She came to the conclusion that I "haven't been laid enough" and my boyfriend is "not doing his job." Thanks Grandma. FML

#19855906
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23585) - you deserved it (4115)

On 06/27/2012 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by RatCityChick - United States (Washington)

Today, I slammed my middle finger in a drawer. I screamed and my mom came running into the kitchen. She asked me what was wrong, so without thinking I stuck up my middle finger. She hasn't spoken to me since this morning. FML

#19848843
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22024) - you deserved it (4962)

On 06/26/2012 at 2:05am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out that if you whistle Christmas carols while shitting in a public bathroom, a little boy might just look under the stall to see if Santa is pooping. FML

#19784207
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12024) - you deserved it (22139)

On 06/13/2012 at 9:17pm - misc - by ww2freak - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out that if you whistle Christmas carols while shitting in a public bathroom, a little boy might just look under the stall to see if Santa is pooping. FML

#19784207
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12024) - you deserved it (22139)

On 06/13/2012 at 9:17pm - misc - by ww2freak - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was cashiering, and a customer's change came to $5.51. She looked pretty stinking rich, so I just gave her $5.50. She demanded the extra penny, and I asked if she really needed it. She said, "No, but they do, asshole," and dropped her $5.51 in the charity donation box. FML

#19781749
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6573) - you deserved it (94856)

On 06/13/2012 at 12:00pm - money - by ouch - United States (Florida)

Today, a man on the bus questioned my sexuality for being a male nurse. I asked him what he did and he said he worked in a garage. When I pointed out that I work with sexy nurses all day and he works with sweaty guys, he punched me in the stomach. FML

#19743527
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33936) - you deserved it (5623)

On 06/06/2012 at 10:19am - misc - by Bishop (man) -

Today, my boss became obsessed with a movie about a pimp. He now refers to all my female coworkers as his "bitches" and refuses to treat us like human beings. Whenever we make a mistake, he rolls his eyes and laughs, "So typical of a prostie." FML

#19736092
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28219) - you deserved it (2541)

On 06/04/2012 at 11:47pm - work - by kufan1324 - United States

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me in a restaurant in front of a lot of people. Once I said yes, some guy yelled out, "SEX. SEX. SEX." My boyfriend yelled back, "LATER!" FML

#19734660
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24670) - you deserved it (5489)

On 06/04/2012 at 7:50pm - intimacy - by BooBabe (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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