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nickjam19

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nickjam19

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  • Number of visits : 786
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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nickjam19's page activity

Visits<b>Comoke1024</b> - the 01/08/2014 at 4:58pm<b>phinsa123</b> - the 04/01/2013 at 9:55am<b>MachineGunAshlee</b> - the 01/24/2013 at 2:43pm<b>jmcgee17</b> - the 01/23/2013 at 10:07am

nickjam19's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of nickjam19's badges

nickjam19's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that my downstairs neighbor is running a business out of her apartment. Or I should say, her pimp is. FML

#20473717
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26843) - you deserved it (2155)

On 01/22/2013 at 8:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. In the entrance way I felt a slight tugging on my jeans. Used to my Doberman tugging when he wants to play, I shoved hard with my foot. I successfully punted their Chihuahua off the ground and into the next room where it landed with a thud. FML

#20460283
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19724) - you deserved it (36360)

On 01/15/2013 at 2:33am - animals - by I think its dead (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I had plans for a romantic night with my boyfriend, who is perfect in every way possible. We were going to have sex for the first time as well. Unfortunately, I had a dream last night about him shitting all over me and I can't look at him with a straight face. FML

#20403258
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35077) - you deserved it (13787)

On 12/17/2012 at 3:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

#20141194
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30769) - you deserved it (3424)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:01am - kids - by poorkids (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I woke up and found a little note where my husband should have been. It said, "We've had some good times, hun, but it's time for me to move on." We've been married for 15 years, and have 3 children. FML

#20121146
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40671) - you deserved it (2136)

On 10/17/2012 at 4:16pm - love - by AbandonedHouseWife - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML

#20119984
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29649) - you deserved it (6023)

On 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by L (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, my boyfriend promised me he wouldn't leave me alone in Niagara. I'm currently sitting alone in the hotel room drinking a bottle of wine while he gambles away money he doesn't have. FML

#20116235
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20091) - you deserved it (3088)

On 10/14/2012 at 8:43am - love - by lonelygirl - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while I was using my computer, my cat ran up to the power strip, looked me in the eyes, and hit the power switch, turning everything off. She does this quite often. FML

#20116072
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23182) - you deserved it (4263)

On 10/14/2012 at 3:00am - animals - by stop it ninja - United States (Virginia)

Today, at work, my buddy pulled up in his car. I handed him $40, and he handed me a bag. It must have looked like a drug deal, but he was actually just smuggling in the new Pokémon game for me. I'm 22, and a drug deal would probably have been less embarrassing to explain. FML

#20109009
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17506) - you deserved it (6956)

On 10/09/2012 at 12:03pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I saw on my 17-year-old daughter's floor her "To-Do" list. What was #1? Jump in front of a moving vehicle, in hopes that Edward Cullen will use his vampire speed to save her. FML

#20102155
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28861) - you deserved it (3597)

On 10/04/2012 at 10:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I have so much ass-acne that it hurts to sit. FML

#20101066
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26777) - you deserved it (5539)

On 10/04/2012 at 5:33am - health - by Chamorru (man) - United States

Today, I found out why it might be awkward to have your plumber and your least well-behaved dog share a name. Bad plumber. FML

#20100991
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17381) - you deserved it (2233)

On 10/04/2012 at 2:20am - animals - by acme - Israel

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my cat meowing, with her dilated vagina in my face, giving birth to her first litter of kittens. FML

#20099894
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34578) - you deserved it (4736)

On 10/03/2012 at 12:29pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I finally got my hands on the new iPhone 5, after I pulled it out of a patient's rectum. FML

#20098468
392 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32921) - you deserved it (2525)

On 10/02/2012 at 3:39pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom screeched at me about my pillowcase being dirty and finished off one long rant with an irate "Who raised you to be such a pig?" Her anger multiplied by ten when I asked if it was a trick question. FML

#20098049
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20072) - you deserved it (6912)

On 10/02/2012 at 6:29am - misc - by kira (woman) - United States



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