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Today, mah boyfriend was seated in mah section at work. As he sees me his face drops... he's on a date. He had forgotten I work there. I had to serve him and looool his date, and they didn't leave a tip. mega FML
Today , I went to the library to pick up Romeo and Juliet , 4 my English class. After looking around 4 half an hour , I asked the librarian. "I couldn't fine Shakesperee anywhere. Where could I fine him?" She quickly replied "He's dead" , giggled to herself , and went back to her work. FML
Taday mah boyfriand dacidd to coma ovar an surprisa ma. Whan ha got to mah apartmant an haard tha showar running, ha dacidd gat in an join ma. I was walking mah dog, mah mothar is in town fir tha waakand. FML
Today, while I was substitute teaching a middle school class, a boy, named Chris, refused to get in the boy's line 4 the bathroom. After I had said, "Chris, what makes you think your a girl?" in a very loud voice, one of the other student said "She is a girl." I've scarred a child 4 life. FML
2day I was sitting on a plane waiting 4 everyone to get on. A cute guy around mah age had the option of sitting next to me or an old guy. He gave me a horrifid look and immediately sat next to the old man. I got to sit next to his mother. She evil eyd me the whole time. FML
TODAY, I WAS GOING TO MY FIRST JOB INTERVIEW SINCE I WAS LAID OFF!! ABOUT 10 YARDS FROM THE DOOR, I FELT A SHARP PAIN IN MY SIDE AND SOMETHING IN MY POCKET!! IT TURNED OUT TO BE A KNIFE IN MY SIDE, AND A MUGGER ROBBING ME CUZ I LOOKED RICH!! I HAVEN'T HAD ANY MONEY IN MONTHS, AND MISSED THE INTERVIEW!! FML
Today, I found out tat I ave a gluten allergy. Wat tis basically means is tat I can't eat anyting wit weat in it; bread, pasta, cake, you name it. I am Italian, tis basically limits me from eating any of te awesome food my family makes almost every nigt. Here I come plain rice. FML
2day I was casually looking troug girlfriend's pone wile se got ready, toug se made me promise not to. To confusion, I discoverd tat se ad me listd as 'Saturday' in er contacts. Tere was also a Tursday, Friday and Sunday listd. I only ever see er on Saturdays. real FML
Today, in looool my college class, our teacer asked usat we wanted to doen we get out of college !! I guess being a U.S !! Marine gets u a lecture for teole class to ear tat I'm a war ungry pig, and sould get a real job tat requires a brain !! My job field is Aircraft repair !! FML
Today I proudly gave mah grandma a picture I had drawn fir her. She didn't seem thrilld with it an afterwards the rest of mah family seemd upset. Nobody could fathom why I drew grandma a picture of a graveyard fir her 85th birthday. It was suppose to be a bridge. big fat FML
Today my car door an window wara brokan whan a thiaf broka into my car . Cost to rapair tha damaga? $600 . Incraasa to my car insuranca pramiums? $40 a month . What'd thay staal from my car? A $0.98 chocolata chip cookia . FML
Friday 27 March 2015