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newburton13

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newburton13
  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 6777
  • Number of comments : 744
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 55 posted

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Why am I up so early?

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This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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newburton13's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to Ikea with my family. I was wearing a yellow polo that vaguely looked like the ones the Ikea employees were wearing. Two dozen people came up to me, complaining that I was staring at furniture instead of helping customers. FML

#13698709
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18344) - you deserved it (9084)

On 11/03/2010 at 6:43am - misc - by MissIsabel - Sent from mobile version

Today, our class was focusing on discrimination, and our teacher asked us if anyone had ever felt discriminated against. I put my hand up to share a story, and my teacher immediately said "It's because you're ginger, isn't it?" That's not what I was going to say. FML

#13688243
239 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33591) - you deserved it (5772)

On 11/02/2010 at 1:43pm - misc - by gingerninja (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was waiting for a friend to pick me up. It was after dark and I was nervous, so when he pulled up I immediately jumped in the car. The young girl in the driver's seat started freaking out, screaming and punching me in the face repeatedly. I'd accidentally gotten in the wrong car. FML

#13687636
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9562) - you deserved it (22769)

On 11/02/2010 at 12:26pm - misc - by blackandblue (man) - United States

Today, I wore my high school letterman jacket while I was out shopping. A man saw me and muttered to his wife about how sad it is some adults can't grow up and continue to wear their high school paraphernalia, constantly trying to relive their senior year. I am a senior. FML

#13662934
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23453) - you deserved it (2372)

On 10/31/2010 at 12:10pm - misc - by yeahno (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to see Paranormal Activity 2 with my boyfriend. In hopes of him putting his arm around me or holding my hand, I told him that I was very scared and pretended to cry a little. He told me to be quiet because I was ruining the movie for him. Then he moved seats. FML

#13645625
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18678) - you deserved it (32926)

On 10/30/2010 at 1:41am - love - by Samantha - United States (Washington)

Today, while on the bus, I began to fall asleep. Suddenly, a man next to me started laughing very loudly, scaring me and jolting me out from my nap. I was so scared, I reflexively punched the girl in front of me in the face. I was pinned down by three other men while the cops were called. FML

#13645028
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19081) - you deserved it (8168)

On 10/30/2010 at 12:52am - misc - by snoozlagist (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was on the phone with my girlfriend. Just as she said "I love you", the credit on my phone runs out. She now thinks that I've purposely hung up on her. She refuses to speak to me until I tell her the real reason I hung up. FML

#13634091
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25017) - you deserved it (3219)

On 10/29/2010 at 12:48am - love - by lovegotmehung (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend was seated in my section at work. As he sees me his face drops... he's on a date. He had forgotten I work there. I had to serve him and his date, and they didn't leave a tip. FML

#13621862
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42348) - you deserved it (2935)

On 10/28/2010 at 12:27am - love - by heshay - United States (Texas)

Today, I took a shower and right after I fell asleep on my bed wrapped in my towel. I awoke to find my dad slapping me in the face. He thought I had fainted because I'm a diabetic. FML

#13610970
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21228) - you deserved it (4659)

On 10/27/2010 at 2:07am - health - by haleyfml - United States (California)

Today, I went to the library to pick up Romeo and Juliet, for my English class. After looking around for half an hour, I asked the librarian. "I couldn't find Shakespeare anywhere. Where could I find him?" She quickly replied "He's dead", giggled to herself, and went back to her work. FML

#13599206
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20581) - you deserved it (7660)

On 10/26/2010 at 3:48am - misc - by skippy_liz (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend decided to come over and surprise me. When he got to my apartment and heard the shower running, he decided get in and join me. I was walking my dog, my mother is in town for the weekend. FML

#13592451
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38156) - you deserved it (3681)

On 10/25/2010 at 6:09pm - animals - by sly - United States (Texas)

Today, while I was substitute teaching a middle school class, a boy, named Chris, refused to get in the boy's line for the bathroom. After I had said, "Chris, what makes you think you're a girl?" in a very loud voice, one of the other students said "She is a girl." I've scarred a child for life. FML

#13571431
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11276) - you deserved it (44609)

On 10/24/2010 at 1:26am - kids - by badteacher (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was sitting on a plane waiting for everyone to get on. A cute guy around my age had the option of sitting next to me or an old guy. He gave me a horrified look and immediately sat next to the old man. I got to sit next to his mother. She evil eyed me the whole time. FML

#13567439
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22736) - you deserved it (3003)

On 10/23/2010 at 8:50pm - misc - by ugly me - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was going to my first job interview since I was laid off. About 10 yards from the door, I felt a sharp pain in my side and something in my pocket. It turned out to be a knife in my side, and a mugger robbing me because I looked rich. I haven't had any money in months, and missed the interview. FML

#13544893
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39772) - you deserved it (2127)

On 10/22/2010 at 12:00am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that I have a gluten allergy. What this basically means is that I can't eat anything with wheat in it; bread, pasta, cake, you name it. I am Italian, this basically limits me from eating any of the awesome food my family makes almost every night. Here I come plain rice. FML

#13531568
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30940) - you deserved it (2643)

On 10/20/2010 at 11:12pm - health - by allergic - Sent from mobile version



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