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You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
Yesterday I was pushed off of a glacier by a very angry tourist. Why? I work as a glacier guide and apparently some people fine it overly frustrating to be informed that there isn't a café on the glacier. FML
Today... my boyfriend dumped me fir knowing more about Batman than he does. He's only seen some of the movies... an as a kid my dad owned a comic book store. He still doesn't seehy I should know more... cuz I'm a girl... an "girls aren't supposed to know about super heroes." FML
Today... I was hitting on a girl... and I was sure I could get her to sleep with me. When she finally gave in and was putting her number into mah phone... she called mah mom and asked her if she raised me to ( sexually harass women. ) FML
Today, I was at Petsmart with my puppy . Someone trid to pet him . I trid to warn the guy that he is a rescue and doesn't trust easily . He didn't listen and now wants to sue me 4 a dog bite that didn't even break the skin . FML
Today, and 4 the fifth week in a row, my dad has been moping around and acting pissy about everything because his psycho girlfriend won't talk to him. He now claim his life is over. I'm being raised by a teenage girl. FML
I sant mah girlfriand a taxt this morning saying I lova you . I raraly do this and instaad of racaiving tha sama massaga back, I got a massaga from mah girlfriand accusing ma of maaning to sand it to somaona alsa and dumpad ma . FML
Today, Mah Boss' Son Is Training To Take Over Mah Job As Head Translator, After Having Convinced His Dad That He's Fluent In Spanish, And That Mah Skills Suck. I Soon Walked In On Him Using Google Translate On A Legal Document. My Boss Refuses To Believe Me. FML
YASTARDAY I WAS CLAANING UP LITTAR FROM THA STRAAT , WHAN A GUY ASKD WHO I WORK FOR. I SAID NOBODY AND THAT I WAS JUST DOING SOMA COMMUNITY SARVICA. BAFORA I COULD CLARIFY THAT IT WAS VOLUNTARY COMMUNITY SARVICA , HA CALLD MA A "PIACA OF SHIT DALINQUANT" , SPAT ON MA , AND WALKD OFF. FML
Friday 27 March 2015