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newburton13

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newburton13

2Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 14734
  • Number of comments : 756
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 55 posted

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newburton13's page activity

Visits<b>carlfirebolt</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 4:21pm<b>alexisaurus</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 2:36pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 11:13pm<b>madison123xx</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 4:25pm<b>kukumber</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 6:51pm<b>kelseysking</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 2:52pm<b>taintedtruffle</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 11:35pm<b>EimP</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 8:12pm<b>KimmieHappyKat</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 12:51am<b>ArmenMM</b> - the 05/28/2014 at 12:43pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 05/09/2014 at 6:29am<b>PierceTheSabrina</b> - the 05/05/2014 at 9:18pm<b>Hildy93</b> - the 04/29/2014 at 2:41am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 6:58pm<b>hi_mynaneisslec</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 3:12am<b>Rizzen</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 9:08pm<b>Fatwahhh</b> - the 03/07/2014 at 6:10pm<b>sammyjo06</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 12:27am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 5:13am<b>madison123xx</b> - the 04/27/2015 at 10:26pm

newburton13's FML badges

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You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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newburton13's favorite FMLs

Today, I went down a water slide. Halfway through, I got stuck behind some kids who were blocking the tube. Seconds later, a big-boned lady crashed into my back. Her solution to break the blockade was to start kicking my back repeatedly as hard as she could. The kids still wouldn't move. FML

#21441433
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28256) - you deserved it (1747)

On 07/14/2015 at 6:33am - misc - by ow my kidneys (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, a week after my miscarriage, my little sister thought it appropriate to wrap her belt around her neck and scream, "Hey look, it's your baby!" FML

#21438976
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39362) - you deserved it (2167)

On 07/09/2015 at 10:38am - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I told my boyfriend how my mom died when I was 11 after crashing her car into a tree at night. He muttered "Women drivers." FML

#21438456
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33584) - you deserved it (2976)

On 07/08/2015 at 10:44am - love - by freshly single (woman) - Aruba

Today, one of my friends asked me to flirt with her boyfriend to see if he would flirt back. Knowing this was a trust test, I agreed. She got pissed at me when he flirted back and still isn't speaking to me. FML

#21436223
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26238) - you deserved it (4769)

On 07/04/2015 at 4:55am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I found out that my parents secretly throw away any food I cook for them, because they think I might try to poison them. FML

#21435904
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25818) - you deserved it (2467)

On 07/03/2015 at 3:02pm - misc - by Rusty (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I politely asked a coworker to stop sticking his chewed-up gum to my desk. It's now 10:57 pm and my tires are slashed. FML

#21431204
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24365) - you deserved it (1529)

On 06/24/2015 at 2:49pm - work - by Ain't going nowhere - United States (Illinois)

Today, after all of the business cards for the car dealership that I work for were printed, the phone number was wrong, and the lady got so pissed about getting so many calls that she told them that they had won a free car. I had to tell dozens of ecstatic customers that they hadn't. FML

#21430788
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22393) - you deserved it (5475)

On 06/23/2015 at 6:37pm - work - by Luke - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband let my 8-year-old twins play with handcuffs. I thought my husband was pretending he had lost the key but after 4 hours, he walked in with his head down and said, "I've made a terrible mistake honey." FML

#21429657
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25970) - you deserved it (2303)

On 06/21/2015 at 5:37pm - kids - by hfs palm - United States

Today, some asshat ran onto the road and tried and jump over my car as I drove by. He didn't make the jump. FML

Today, I caught my mother-in-law trying to plant a GPS tracker on my car. FML

#21428876
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26705) - you deserved it (1783)

On 06/20/2015 at 1:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my ex-boyfriend dumped sand into the crankcase of my truck and then filled it to the top with water after I dumped him for being immature and not respecting my things. FML

#21427999
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30063) - you deserved it (3276)

On 06/18/2015 at 8:36am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, from across the parking lot, I saw a woman break into my car and steal my "Handicapped parking" placard. Guess why I couldn't stop her. FML

#21427634
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34910) - you deserved it (1814)

On 06/17/2015 at 3:18pm - misc - by hobbled - United States

Today, my co-worker told me how "lucky" I am that I "chose" to be a lesbian, because I don't have to deal with "guy drama". I spent two years of my adolescence sleeping at a bus stop and begging strangers for money after I got kicked out of home. FML

#21427509
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35473) - you deserved it (3399)

On 06/17/2015 at 9:31am - misc - by Lesbihonest (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I told my mom I was going hiking with a couple of friends and wouldn't be back for 4 or more hours. Not even 2 hours later, she called the cops and reported us as missing. She didn't realize that we wouldn't have service up the canyon so we could call her back. FML

#21426852
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26937) - you deserved it (2016)

On 06/16/2015 at 1:47am - misc - by use your brain mother - United States (Utah)

Today, during jury duty, the shitbag who's accused of capital murder in our trial took the stand. The prosecution made him look like a total idiot. He got more and more flustered and eventually screamed at us that he'll have us killed if we find him guilty. I believe him. FML

#21421289
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27303) - you deserved it (2392)

On 06/05/2015 at 2:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)



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