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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was sitting in traffic for about an hour. I've heard stories about people doing the dirty in their cars and I never do anything risky so I thought, why not, I'll be here a while, no one can see me: I'll masturbate. Midway through I hear a tap on my driver's window. Its a police officer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22409) - you deserved it (111161)
On 03/03/2009 at 1:29am - intimacy - by imanidiot (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my roommate and I finally got fed up with this increasingly, horrible stench that has been in our apartment for a few days now. Leaving it for our other roommates to handle, we selfishly left to get yogurtland. Moments later, we both expressed that we haven't seen our cat in a while. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10206) - you deserved it (43969)
On 03/02/2009 at 4:32pm - animals - by pacificbeach - United States (California)
Today, the fitting room of the store I worked in smelled really bad. The customers started to complain and since I was on fitting room duty I went to go investigate. A middle aged woman pooped on the floor and then put the chair on top to cover it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (86894) - you deserved it (3149)
On 03/02/2009 at 8:38am - work - by fittingroompotty (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I borrowed a van to move some of my furniture. I wasn't used to the brakes so when I stopped at a red light, I pretty much ended up in the cross walk. Suddenly I heard a loud thud at the side of the van. I turned to see what idiot would walk into a van. It was a blind man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10647) - you deserved it (38235)
On 03/01/2009 at 8:09pm - misc - by jazojigga (man) - United States (California)
Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54271) - you deserved it (593511)
On 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm - misc - by ihavepinkbackpac (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I slept over at a friend's house. We decided to dress up as ninjas and play a trick on her younger brothers, sleeping in the basement. While sneaking down the stairs, in the dark, her mother came home. Thinking I was a robber, she beat me with a lamp. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17373) - you deserved it (31389)
On 02/28/2009 at 1:40am - misc - by RosaP (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, while at work at my grocery store I sold a TON of eggs to a bunch of kids. We joked around that they were "going to bake a giant cake." When I got home I found out someone had egged my house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40771) - you deserved it (7113)
On 02/28/2009 at 1:30am - work - by eggs (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I came to school late because I had to drop off my daughter at school. When I got on campus, the security told me I was late but I said, "Oh no, I work here." and he said, "Oh like I haven't heard that one before." And he took me to detention. My boss, the Principal, had to bail me out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36780) - you deserved it (2048)
On 02/21/2009 at 6:22am - work - by Lily (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I need to go to the toilet. Thinking that everyone has left work, I decide that, since I AM a jedi, my penis ought to be my Light saber. All of a sudden I hear a familiar voice: “At least someone is having fun!” It was my boss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5711) - you deserved it (19652)
On 12/15/2008 at 10:58pm - work - by lopez - Sent from mobile version
Monday 17 June 2013
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