Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

netdemon

Search for a member

netdemon

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 10 June 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2759
  • Number of comments : 30
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About netdemon : Apparently, I suck at life...

netdemon's page activity

Visits<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 5:31am<b>heirofhope</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 2:51pm<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 04/26/2014 at 4:31am<b>FueledByFate</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 5:42am<b>MainPrism</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 4:11am<b>bigbird44</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 1:18am<b>msmama1985</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 11:04pm<b>Sbx426</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 6:32am<b>nic5x</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 12:27am<b>lozowen</b> - the 11/21/2013 at 10:03am<b>amsdredre22</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 8:59pm<b>FairyTaleZombies</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 2:19pm<b>adyb</b> - the 11/14/2013 at 4:46am<b>HopelesslyCiara5</b> - the 10/04/2013 at 3:38pm<b>rick1</b> - the 09/30/2013 at 11:13am<b>alexissblakee</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 10:37pm<b>iAlissa</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 3:56pm<b>Saone</b> - the 08/24/2013 at 7:05pm

netdemon's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of netdemon's badges

netdemon's favorite FMLs

Today, in the midst of having sex, my boyfriend decided that, as a joke, he would pretend to be a zombie whilst going down on me. Sadly, the thought turned me so much that I came. This was the first orgasm he's ever given me in over a year of dating. FML

#19064063
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31981) - you deserved it (6160)

On 02/13/2012 at 8:37am - intimacy - by lotrgeek (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I received a letter from the state saying my 14-year-old daughter is now legally recognized as a male. I have no idea what happened. FML

#18766108
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42857) - you deserved it (4395)

On 01/10/2012 at 12:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - India

Today, my 28-year-old brother who has been pranking me all my life, put a chocolate cupcake on my chair. I sat on it, with my white dress. On my wedding day. FML

#18004959
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64287) - you deserved it (3879)

On 10/17/2011 at 4:39am - misc - by cupcake_butt - United States

Today, I had to sit on the bus next to a creepy guy. He began pestering me with overly-sexual statements, and finally I told him I had a boyfriend. He responded with "Tell me his name so I can track him down, kill him, and hopefully take his place." FML

#18004250
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43435) - you deserved it (3550)

On 10/17/2011 at 1:44am - intimacy - by pokeballbra - United States (Texas)

Today, I was in a public restroom. The guy in the urinal next to me was making loud sounds of discomfort. I ignored him and finished up. I turned around to be greeted by his red swollen beehive of a crotch, and him asking, "Is my penis supposed to look like this?" FML

#18003683
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33779) - you deserved it (2386)

On 10/17/2011 at 12:20am - health - by blarp - United States (New Jersey)

Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML

#17874410
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25611) - you deserved it (6084)

On 09/30/2011 at 10:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, after being in love with one of my best friends for ages, he took me on a date. We then went back to his place and we made love. Afterwards, he told me he wanted to show me something and led me outside. He ran back in and locked the door. It's a two hour walk home. FML

#17174791
321 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52254) - you deserved it (6680)

On 07/19/2011 at 7:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, as a joke, I hid under my parents' bed, hoping to scare them when they came home. When they finally arrived, they burst through their bedroom door, tearing each other's clothes off. I had to keep my breath in time with my mom's panting and moaning as my dad brutally dominated her. FML

#17109043
425 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30132) - you deserved it (88323)

On 07/14/2011 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by gir - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had to bail my dad out of jail, for beating up my boyfriend, for sleeping with my mom. FML

#17089969
505 comments

I agree, your life sucks (129886) - you deserved it (7317)

On 07/13/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by whyme102008 - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML

#17088739
429 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73473) - you deserved it (7666)

On 07/13/2011 at 1:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up to my pants off and my vibrator still on. I fell asleep masturbating. FML

#17080549
528 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20242) - you deserved it (52220)

On 07/12/2011 at 1:25pm - intimacy - by 44haley44 - United States

Today, I saw a turtle on the road so I swerved, and hit a tree. The people behind me then hit the turtle. FML

#17078585
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33179) - you deserved it (11018)

On 07/12/2011 at 9:26am - misc - by turtle - United States (Illinois)

Today, I saw a turtle on the road so I swerved, and hit a tree. The people behind me then hit the turtle. FML

#17078585
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33179) - you deserved it (11018)

On 07/12/2011 at 9:26am - misc - by turtle - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML

#16879378
361 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60075) - you deserved it (7407)

On 06/27/2011 at 9:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

#16860650
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38701) - you deserved it (15588)

On 06/26/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: