Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

nerdsgetmehot

Search for a member

nerdsgetmehot
  • Town/Country : United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 2 July 1989 (24 years)
  • Number of visits : 46434
  • Number of comments : 3799
  • Number of FMLs : 2 confirmed out of 134 posted

About nerdsgetmehot : Videos in which I dance and make an idiot of myself:
http://www.youtube.com/slightlyawkward

I'm a dork.

My posted FML: http://www.fmylife.com/miscellaneous/15679727#c_10649525

The video that I've been watching on a daily basis (or more) lately:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ie7ctYQsSgI

nerdsgetmehot's last visitors

lild343CacksonicCaptainJudgmenttehaustiebearFedergirlEdogg215triplebeeroxevalu8torNish007GeneralStew

nerdsgetmehot's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of nerdsgetmehot's badges

nerdsgetmehot's favorite FMLs

Today, my sister and I were eating at Wendy's. On the way out, I thought it would be funny to kick the door open and yell, "This is Sparta!" I lost my balance and fell flat on my butt. FML

#16359968
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7243) - you deserved it (57991)

On 05/26/2011 at 5:31pm - misc - by taydean - United States (Colorado)

Today, at 21 years old, I am still so flat chested that I can't even fit into training bras meant for 12 year olds. FML

#15679727
590 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48044) - you deserved it (5152)

On 04/07/2011 at 12:55pm - misc - by nerdsgetmehot (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, it was the début of the high school musical I was in. When two others and I sang the word "Hell", my mother yelled at us for using that language, while the musical was still going, and dragged me off stage. FML

#15281209
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40212) - you deserved it (3239)

On 03/12/2011 at 12:14am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, after struggling for hours to fall asleep with my husbands rather rattling snoring, I finally managed it... only to be rudely awakened an hour later by my husband elbowing me in the face in his sleep. FML

#14990057
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20065) - you deserved it (2754)

On 02/15/2011 at 12:10pm - love - by Ugh (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, the lady running the pastry shop asked who I buy the second pastry for every day. I lied and told her that it's for a coworker. I eat them both. FML

#14985221
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8508) - you deserved it (30424)

On 02/15/2011 at 1:25am - misc - by a fatty -

Today, I was working as an intern at a day care. One of the kids touched my chest a couple of times, and I jokingly told him that he shouldn't touch old and ugly women like me. So he started groping the little girls instead. When the other teachers asked him why, he said I had told him to. FML

#14974014
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28302) - you deserved it (10640)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:51pm - kids - by Mikabe (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)

Today, I went out for pizza with my boyfriend. He loaned me his debit card and loudly announced in front of everyone that his pin code was the numerical equivalent of "Fart", and repeated it twice, just in case I hadn't heard. FML

#14969224
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21804) - you deserved it (3382)

On 02/14/2011 at 2:14am - misc - by datingamoron (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

#14968643
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44126) - you deserved it (8911)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that it is never, ever a good idea to put a band-aid of any kind on your penis, because eventually you will have to take it off. FML

#14967873
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7418) - you deserved it (44642)

On 02/14/2011 at 12:31am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? I dare you." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML

#14965591
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12420) - you deserved it (45486)

On 02/13/2011 at 10:25pm - misc - by NotAsToughAsHeThinks (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, my roommate complained about his penis being smelly and itchy. It's been a week. Yesterday he woke me up in the middle of the night, asking if I had some kind of Vaseline or moisturizer he could use for the itching. He still refuses to go to the doctor. FML

#14962241
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26133) - you deserved it (2255)

On 02/13/2011 at 7:09pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML

#14849779
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48492) - you deserved it (3573)

On 02/05/2011 at 7:02am - misc - by bob - United States (Arizona)

Today, I noticed that after a month of using my gel, it never seems to empty. I then found out my older brother and his friends had been pumping their man-juice into it. FML

#14838014
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65547) - you deserved it (6031)

On 02/04/2011 at 9:08am - intimacy - by theish -

Today, at a restaurant, I ordered the best chocolate soufflé on the menu, which was called "Double Satisfaction". The waiter asked me what would I like to order. The words that came out of my mouth were "Double Orgasm". FML

#14796617
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16880) - you deserved it (36427)

On 02/01/2011 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by theshameofit (woman) - Cyprus (Limassol)

Today, I woke up to my new roommate staring at me, just a few inches from my face. She then told me how easy I would be to kill in my sleep. Then she stood up, naked from head to toe. FML

#14719810
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38083) - you deserved it (3129)

On 01/26/2011 at 12:40pm - misc - by 123roomielover (woman) - United States (Michigan)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: