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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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nativebacon

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nativebacon
  • Town/Country : St. Louis, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 3 March 1988 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 36434
  • Number of comments : 96
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About nativebacon : I am a music education major at Southeast Missouri State University. I am incredibly passionate about opera, and I plan to get my masters in performance and my PhD in vocal pedagogy.

I am bisexual, and it's not a choice.

I do not believe in organized religion, but I try to respect other religions as much as possible (unless they're thrown in my face).

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nativebacon's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

nativebacon's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned it's not a good idea to answer your phone with "F*** off!" just because you're having a bad day. It could just be your pastor on the other end. FML

#8867961 (167)

I agree, your life sucks (3575) - you deserved it (27705)

On 03/06/2010 at 12:13pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, I ran into a former college classmate at Subway. He gushed on and on about how I was the only one in our class with true potential. Then I asked him what kind of sandwich he wanted, because 3 years out of college, Subway is still the only place that will hire a music major. FML

#8125796 (253)

I agree, your life sucks (17823) - you deserved it (4382)

On 02/11/2010 at 9:07am - work - by Prodigy (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my drunk mother got into a fight with the lady at Krystal burger. Why? "Because the bitch said they aren't making special orders." FML

#8085656 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (13874) - you deserved it (1438)

On 02/10/2010 at 10:10am - misc - by Krit - United States

Today, at work I was ringing up some tampons for a woman, and I try to interact with the shoppers as much as possible. I was trying to think of something witty or funny to say but drew a blank, so I decided just to say "have a nice night." What I actually said was "have a nice flow". FML

#7492497 (77)

I agree, your life sucks (6171) - you deserved it (19397)

On 01/22/2010 at 1:26am - work - by iluvjenknee (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, a man I don't know came up to me and started screaming about how "all you damn Mexicans were stealing American's jobs" and he stormed off. I'm Native American, and I'm pretty sure we've been here longer. FML

#7482237 (50)

I agree, your life sucks (38297) - you deserved it (2701)

On 01/21/2010 at 7:45pm - misc - by hardtotell (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I came home from a long day at work to find a path of rose pedals from the front door. Gasping with surprise, I followed it past the living room... past the bedroom... into the kitchen, where there was a note that said "Friends coming over tonight, we need food, love you!" FML

#7353628 (134)

I agree, your life sucks (22340) - you deserved it (2574)

On 01/15/2010 at 3:33am - love - by Romantic (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was sent to the hospital for being knocked out with a potato. FML

#7290118 (142)

I agree, your life sucks (20111) - you deserved it (2568)

On 01/11/2010 at 10:40pm - health - by brileyyyy - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML

#7212033 (158)

I agree, your life sucks (24379) - you deserved it (1856)

On 01/08/2010 at 2:23am - kids - by PeanutlyDisabled - France

Today, after months of trying, my wife of seven years told me she is finally pregnant. I'm going to be an uncle. FML

#7189298 (223)

I agree, your life sucks (48434) - you deserved it (2068)

On 01/06/2010 at 10:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I handed my friend a $50. I paid her to take care of my farm on Farmville, feed my fish on Fishville, and flip my burgers on Cafe World, while I went on vacation for a week. FML

#7122357 (212)

I agree, your life sucks (6905) - you deserved it (42761)

On 01/03/2010 at 7:00am - misc - by loser (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mother forwarded me an email my stepdad had sent her because he was annoyed that I left a light on last night. Talk about communication problems. I wonder how I'm going to tell them I'm pregnant. FML

#7121728 (246)

I agree, your life sucks (22111) - you deserved it (4016)

On 01/03/2010 at 5:36am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML

#7022853 (108)

I agree, your life sucks (26950) - you deserved it (2202)

On 12/29/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by sickofsick - United States

Today, Facebook told me I should reconnect with my husband. FML

#6967359 (90)

I agree, your life sucks (21909) - you deserved it (5481)

On 12/27/2009 at 1:30am - love - by reconnect (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my parents bought me an alarm clock that runs away from you while beeping obnoxiously when you hit snooze. I just had ankle surgery and am unable to walk. FML

#6966351 (107)

I agree, your life sucks (20174) - you deserved it (1577)

On 12/27/2009 at 12:35am - misc - by Crippled (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mother informed me that I am not allowed to drive in snow. I live in Minnesota. FML

#6958712 (126)

I agree, your life sucks (17370) - you deserved it (1661)

On 12/26/2009 at 4:45pm - misc - by Snow (woman) - United States (Minnesota)