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natecordero

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natecordero

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 6 August 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 183
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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natecordero's favorite FMLs

Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML

#19959363
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10699) - you deserved it (36795)

On 07/19/2012 at 2:55pm - misc - by Bontempi (man) - France

Today, I brought my 90-year-old grandfather into school for a project that required to bring in "a first-hand account" of the Great Depression. He started off by telling the class how in his day, they "threw rocks at black people." FML

#19608717
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26413) - you deserved it (3819)

On 05/11/2012 at 7:52pm - misc - by Class (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, a client shouted at me over something that had nothing to do with me. She put such effort into shouting that she farted in my office. FML

#19331410
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21992) - you deserved it (1753)

On 03/23/2012 at 5:44am - work - by ANNIEDBD - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I discovered how startling it is to wake up by having your cat springboard off your face. The intended prey? Two fornicating geckos on the ceiling. FML

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

#18465913
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11002) - you deserved it (87393)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States

Today, I saw my neighbor's Christmas tree they had put up on their porch, with decorative presents under it. Being that my neighbors hate me, I figured I would take a present to piss them off. While walking back home with the present, I opened it. Inside it read "I knew you would, douche bag." FML

#18464488
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7942) - you deserved it (71759)

On 12/08/2011 at 10:35pm - misc - by lebato97 - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I introduced my Chinese-born girlfriend to the rest of the family. My uncle immediately blurted out, "He's dating a communist." FML

#18242988
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32789) - you deserved it (4278)

On 11/14/2011 at 12:23am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I cut my penis on a desk fan. FML

#18217902
379 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18116) - you deserved it (76713)

On 11/11/2011 at 10:53am - intimacy - by dumbassbuffet (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML

#18087484
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32144) - you deserved it (7950)

On 10/27/2011 at 8:22am - intimacy - by ifeeldirty (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I shat a magnet. FML

#17843744
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11915) - you deserved it (31039)

On 09/26/2011 at 10:51pm - health - by mimi - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out my wife and three daughters all have their period on seperate weeks. I now have no break from yelling. FML

#17761753
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38244) - you deserved it (4592)

On 09/17/2011 at 12:39am - misc - by thedeerman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML

#17448380
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25895) - you deserved it (2535)

On 08/12/2011 at 6:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I walked outside my house to find my father in nothing but his underwear, spraying ants with ant-killer, laughing like a maniac and screaming, "Die bitches! Die!" FML

#17447180
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31788) - you deserved it (4275)

On 08/12/2011 at 2:17am - misc - by TuteSweet - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my sister told me not to come over anymore because her baby is scared of my face. FML

#16861259
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36796) - you deserved it (4015)

On 06/26/2011 at 3:02am - misc - by ugly - United States

Today, I shat out a staple. FML

#16576766
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37483) - you deserved it (16313)

On 06/09/2011 at 11:04am - health - by wtf - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)



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