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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, I overheard my husband telling my step-dad that I have the same ability to sniff out chocolate in a house as a certain animal has to find truffles in the woods. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13480) - you deserved it (4454)
On 12/22/2010 at 3:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, after an argument with a coworker, I sent him "Sorry about being such a jerk" in a reply to a mass email he had sent. I accidentally hit 'Reply All'. I now have 32 "It's okay" messages in my inbox. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6476) - you deserved it (18891)
On 12/20/2010 at 5:26pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, while on my honeymoon with my new wife, I tried to be romantic by installing a clapper to the lights in our room. As things progressed, the noise of our love making triggered the lights on and off repeatedly. She began to laugh and we ended up just calling it an early night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23590) - you deserved it (9801)
On 12/17/2010 at 12:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)
Today, my toddler stood up in the shopping cart and fell giving himself a black eye. Later while at a restaurant he tried to stand up in his highchair. I quickly blurted out "Sit down! Do you want another one of those?" while pointing at his eye. Now the waiter wont stop glaring at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33201) - you deserved it (7632)
On 12/15/2010 at 12:42am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, my six year old told me I have a big nose. When I told her that she hurt my feelings, she laughed and said "Don't be silly mummy, ugly people don't have feelings." FML
I agree, your life sucks (91262) - you deserved it (10764)
On 12/14/2010 at 3:21am - kids - by uglywoman - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I was sitting in a parked car. A woman was having difficulties maneuvering out. She honked the horn repeatedly for me to move, then looked me in the eye and called me a "f**king bitch", before driving off. I was in the passenger seat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22628) - you deserved it (2080)
On 12/08/2010 at 10:24am - misc - by agstadra (woman) - Canada
Today, I managed to not think too much about how alone I feel living in a strange city, and I went out to find a quiet place to write and eat. After I ordered my meal, I saw that I was the only diner that was sitting alone at a table. Then 'All By Myself' came on the radio. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24688) - you deserved it (2341)
Today, I learned that I wasn't really allergic to chocolate. My parents made it up when I was a child because they didn't want me to get fat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30689) - you deserved it (2982)
On 11/25/2010 at 2:32am - misc - by wow (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend of a year because I discovered she had been cheating on me. Her defense was, "It wouldn't be a problem if you were just OK with this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25615) - you deserved it (1990)
On 11/23/2010 at 4:32am - intimacy - by anonymous -
Today, I was walking with and hugging my girlfriend at the same time. I tried to be funny and touched her breast, saying "Boob" in a silly voice. In reply, she slapped me in the crotch, saying "Dick" in the same voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6813) - you deserved it (45217)
On 11/21/2010 at 3:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Mexico (Morelos)
Today, I took my two-year-old daughter swimming. While sitting in the hot tub, my daughter pointed to the elderly man sitting across from us and mumbled something. I couldn't understand her, so I asked her to repeat it. After two more attempts, she shouted, "MOM! He has big boobs!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (17829) - you deserved it (5016)
Today, I realised I haven't had a date in so long that I actually seriously considered meeting someone from online, purely based on the fact he could spell properly. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16173) - you deserved it (2734)
On 11/13/2010 at 1:09am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I jokingly asked my husband if he had ever cheated on me. In the most sincere and honest tone, he said "if I ever have or ever will, there's no way you would ever find out. I love you too much to lose you", and gave me a hug. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27584) - you deserved it (5785)
On 11/03/2010 at 2:40am - intimacy - by spockswifey - United States
Today, I was so lonely that I had a 3 hour conversation with a one-legged cricket I found in my room. I'm keeping him. He has a name. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25067) - you deserved it (8218)
On 11/03/2010 at 12:39am - misc - by nk (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I was patting my kitten who was asleep underneath the blanket on my lap. My roommate walked in and gave me disgusted look. She thought I was playing with myself. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16106) - you deserved it (4403)
On 10/28/2010 at 8:00am - intimacy - by djoe - Australia (South Australia)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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