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narrowords

Offline (the 08/27/2014 at 9:30pm) | Search for a member

narrowords

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2320
  • Number of comments : 104
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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narrowords's favorite FMLs

Today, my sister confessed to me that she sold some of my old shirts to the girl who's stalking me. This explains why I got a note that read, "I have your scent, now I can track you." FML

#16965226
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40992) - you deserved it (2606)

On 07/03/2011 at 8:27pm - misc - by beablue18 - Germany (Rheinland-Pfalz)

Today, the driver's side window of my car was busted, and inside was a note that said, "Sorry, thought this was my car." FML

#16932864
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32209) - you deserved it (2137)

On 07/01/2011 at 4:31am - misc - by Rick - United States (California)

Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML

#16860650
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38751) - you deserved it (15595)

On 06/26/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, I got mugged. As the guys who took my purse were about to walk away, my cellphone rang in my pocket. FML

#16812585
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37722) - you deserved it (2884)

On 06/23/2011 at 4:54am - money - by alo1434 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my husband asked me to come see his turd. After saying no, he said, "What kind of wife are you?" FML

#16687170
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32757) - you deserved it (9195)

On 06/15/2011 at 11:53pm - misc - by randomjulz - United States

Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML

#16661334
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12615) - you deserved it (57819)

On 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm - money - by notinthebutt (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was eating Star Wars gummy candies and I bit R2-D2 in half. My girlfriend looked at it and said "Oh look, now he's R1-D1". It was super cute, but I couldn't help thinking, "That's not how the numbering system works for droids." FML

#16657656
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13659) - you deserved it (47877)

On 06/14/2011 at 6:04am - misc - by techiefIve (man) - United States (California)

Today, after I successfully blew up a really large balloon, my mom said, in front of my older brother's friends, "Wow, you're going to make some man really happy one day!" FML

#16510202
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41028) - you deserved it (8195)

On 06/05/2011 at 2:48am - intimacy - by e_edge (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, at my job as a lifeguard, the kids in the pool decided to start a new game. The game involved spreading out to different parts of the pool and pretending to be drowning at the same time. Whoever was "saved" first, won. FML

#16494046
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44004) - you deserved it (3262)

On 06/04/2011 at 2:15am - work - by zain - United States (Texas)

Today, my boss called me to his office, and played back a recording of me telling a co-worker that if I still worked there in a year, I would hang myself. He then bitched me out for unprofessional conduct. The taped conversation took place over a year ago, with my recently ex-boyfriend. FML

#16487802
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24426) - you deserved it (6847)

On 06/03/2011 at 7:23pm - work - by janice - United States

Today, I received a phone call from my old boss asking me why I wasn't at work, to which I responded, "Because you fired me yesterday". He didn't say anything, and hung up. FML

#16480266
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36601) - you deserved it (2975)

On 06/03/2011 at 5:57am - work - by xmeatballx21 - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I was shopping for clothes. I thought this guy was a mannequin because he was standing perfectly still. I poked him and he screamed like a girl. FML

#16464729
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13481) - you deserved it (31829)

On 06/02/2011 at 6:05am - misc - by ohcrap - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend told me how she loves when I kiss her out of the blue. I don't have the heart to admit I only do it so I can get some peace and quiet for a few seconds. FML

#16429286
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16737) - you deserved it (34263)

On 05/31/2011 at 12:51am - love - by romantic84 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he pees on the toilet seat just to piss me off. FML

#16414850
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38079) - you deserved it (8282)

On 05/30/2011 at 8:18am - misc - by Miramichi - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my girlfriend and I were taking a shower together. We were fooling around when she takes the shower head and starts spraying my penis with it. I asked her "what are you doing?" Her response: "I'm watering it to make it grow." FML

#16399874
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60050) - you deserved it (12569)

On 05/29/2011 at 10:04am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States



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