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narrowords

Offline (the 08/05/2015 at 1:04pm) | Search for a member

narrowords

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4439
  • Number of comments : 104
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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narrowords's favorite FMLs

Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML

#17737717
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28279) - you deserved it (11535)

On 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by unicorn - United States (Georgia)

Today, I apologized to the cat for walking into the laundry room while he was using the litter box. FML

#17734128
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24983) - you deserved it (9702)

On 09/13/2011 at 2:05am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was at the library, and had finally found the book I'd been looking for, when a man approaches me, says "The main character dies at the end", and walks away. FML

#17655744
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33843) - you deserved it (3241)

On 09/03/2011 at 8:04pm - misc - by haha - United States (California)

Today, I found out apparently, I have a weird looking vagina. How? My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He took one look at my vagina and with a look of horror said, "I have never seen one this GROSS." He's a gynecologist and probably sees 20 vaginas a day. FML

#17536285
469 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60791) - you deserved it (7448)

On 08/21/2011 at 5:59am - intimacy - by Username - United States (Ohio)

Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML

#17526290
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36245) - you deserved it (4765)

On 08/20/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by W1D0 - United States (Illinois)

Today, my car was broken into, and they stole all my CDs, but left my daughter's Black Eyed Peas CD behind. I'm pretty pissed about the theft, but almost glad to see that the delinquents in my town have a decent taste in music. FML

#17444868
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31014) - you deserved it (4102)

On 08/11/2011 at 10:30pm - money - by Musicfan - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend leaned over and sniffed me like a dog. He does this almost every day, even in front of people sometimes. FML

#17427573
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27167) - you deserved it (6850)

On 08/10/2011 at 8:36am - love - by Username - United States

Today, I was sitting in the hospital waiting area. An old lady was crying, and my five year old daughter asked her, "Are you okay?" The woman quietly nodded, prompting my daughter to scream at the top of her lungs, "Well shut up then!" FML

#17391065
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37562) - you deserved it (10698)

On 08/06/2011 at 9:40pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized that as a U.S. Marine in the infantry, I'm more afraid to talk to girls than I am of getting shot at. FML

#17352313
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43794) - you deserved it (5787)

On 08/03/2011 at 3:40am - love - by Tim - United States

Today, I was arrested. The policeman threw me to the ground because I wouldn't answer his questions. This was after he told me I had the "right to remain silent". FML

#17227396
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39425) - you deserved it (8040)

On 07/23/2011 at 6:29am - misc - by tgd4444 (man) - Malaysia (Johor)

Today, already knowing that my girlfriend wanted to be "just friends", I invited her over, hoping to change her mind. She was playfully drawing on me with a pen when I noticed she'd written "Emily's property" on my leg. I said "Aw, I'm yours?" She then drew a for-sale sign on me. FML

#17190246
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40003) - you deserved it (11362)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:38pm - love - by John (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out my boyfriend has checked every girl he has ever slept with for 'vagina teeth'. I'm apparently no exception. FML

#17184971
380 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38690) - you deserved it (5542)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:40am - intimacy - by knolan - United States

Today, my boyfriend wanted me to meet the girl he has been cheating on me with. He thinks it makes the cheating more understandable if I see how 'hot' she is. FML

#17165263
352 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64189) - you deserved it (5951)

On 07/18/2011 at 4:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she thought I was cheating on her. With my own sister. FML

#17153294
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47234) - you deserved it (4142)

On 07/17/2011 at 8:04pm - intimacy - by Cinnamon (man) - Jamaica (Saint Andrew)

Today, in front of family and friends, as I got down on one knee, my girlfriend fainted. Her father, a lawyer, rushed over and said, "Anything she says for the next 72 hours is not legally binding" and whisked her away. FML

#17147393
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39916) - you deserved it (2825)

On 07/17/2011 at 8:34am - love - by bigjohn106 - United States (Maryland)



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