About nabzilla : n a b z i l l a ♥
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, my boyfriend and I were starting to get in the mood. I get on top of him, lean down to kiss him, and he begins to laugh. Puzzled, I ask him why. He tells me that when I'm naked and on top of him, I remind him of a cow, with 'udders' . Offended, I go to get off. 'No no' he protests, 'a SEXY cow'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26074) - you deserved it (3493)
On 08/30/2009 at 7:35pm - intimacy - by sigh (woman) - United Kingdom (Manchester)
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me by sending me a Bumper Sticker on Facebook that said "Bitch, let's get married". FML
I agree, your life sucks (47974) - you deserved it (5688)
On 08/30/2009 at 12:40pm - love - by mylifesucks (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I had a stressful day at work and decided to go in the jacuzzi. I hadn't used it for a year, so it was a little dirty. After I cleaned it, filled it up, and jumped in, I pressed the jets. Immediately, thousands of dead moths shot out at full speed towards me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46786) - you deserved it (12027)
On 08/30/2009 at 11:23am - misc - by mel (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I told my boyfriend that my fantasy was for him to eat me out on the dinner table. My boyfriend told me his was me in a Pikachu costume. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36300) - you deserved it (6508)
On 08/30/2009 at 1:38am - intimacy - by pokie (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I had to explain to my father why most of the bar was giving him dirty looks at a concert. His air guitar motions made it look like he was jacking off under the table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28808) - you deserved it (1871)
On 08/30/2009 at 1:25am - intimacy - by Embarassed (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, after two years of dating, I gave my virginity to my boyfriend on my birthday. It wasn't as all like I dreamed about; I dreamt that I wasn't allergic to latex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46157) - you deserved it (3810)
On 08/30/2009 at 12:16am - love - by arsewipe92 (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I was taking a shower outside at my fiancé's beach house. I was struggling to take my bikini bottoms off so I started to walk backwards to step out of it. Little did I know that I had pushed the door open. My fiancé, his family, and my family all saw me bend over naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26916) - you deserved it (5813)
On 08/29/2009 at 12:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (54697) - you deserved it (12530)
On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, on the train on the way to my mother's house, I was playing Mariokart with my son. He got a 'bomb' item, and yelled quite loudly, "I have a bomb!". Panic ensued. We got thrown off the train at the next stop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40105) - you deserved it (4934)
On 08/28/2009 at 12:41am - kids - by mariokarter (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I lazily answered the door in my pajamas. It was my elderly neighbor asking to borrow a can opener. Despite the strange and unwarranted scowl she was giving me I obliged. It wasn't until after she had left that I notice my penis was completely sticking out through the flap in my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36252) - you deserved it (17639)
On 08/27/2009 at 3:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I found out why my 20 year-old girlfriend broke up with me. She was building everything she did to match her favorite TV show. The main character left her boyfriend in the exact way she left me. And the breakup email she sent me contained monologue from the TV show, word for word. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58055) - you deserved it (3583)
On 08/26/2009 at 3:09am - love - by micahmatt (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I woke up to the sounds of birds singing, the smell of butter pancakes in the air and thought to myself "Wow, today is going to be great day. I can feel it!" Excited, I jumped out of my bed and threw open the door to see my 58 year old mother doing her morning stretches in the nude. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36010) - you deserved it (3415)
On 08/25/2009 at 2:47am - animals - by MrMagicMan000 (man) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling after getting it on a few times. He holds my face in his hands, looks deep into my eyes and says "I smell chicken." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27653) - you deserved it (4361)
On 08/24/2009 at 11:34pm - love - by isoheartcaitlin (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I got a new cell phone. I was texting pictures from my old phone to my new one, including several dirty ones, when I noticed I wasn't receiving any of them on the new phone. I was texting the wrong number. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8471) - you deserved it (41281)
On 08/24/2009 at 7:49pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I got my first period. My dad bought me a card and had everyone in my family sign it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45410) - you deserved it (3738)
On 08/24/2009 at 3:59pm - misc - by embarassed_chick (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Monday 17 June 2013
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